beginning at the beginning

[missingout]

I'm a 50 yr old woman, raised 5 kids although 3 still depend on me. The children have no one but me their fathers died and the extended family has offered no help. My youngest has diabetes ...she got it when she was 10 she's now almost 18. I was recently in an abusive relationship for 13 long years. I have remarried a wonderful man in every way except he has me in the poorhouse . I have had to sell a lot of what I own just to bail us out of money situations. even though he has a full time job he's always calling in sick etc even knowing he shouldn't be doing this since we are so far in debt. Before be moved in with me my credit was excellent...now Its ruined. I put a roof over everyone's head and I am so tired. ALL I want to do is sleep because there are no worries there. I am tired of working since I was 14 and always taking care of everyone. My abusive ex treated me so poorly
. I think I deserve to have someone take care of me for a change. No one knows what goes on inside of me...I put on my poker face but I just an ready to break down. I cry constantly...it just comes over me. I don't have anyone to go to for support. no family....friends are not that close...just don't know how to go on

[balcony]

Missingout, a big hug to you. What an accomplishment to raise 5 children. I so admire you. I am very sorry to read about your current situation, does your husband suffer from depression? If you suspect that it might be an issue, professional help might be a start to improving the situation.

As for you, yes..you need to reach out to as many people as possible and find ways to re-charge the battery. Caring for people takes a huge toll and with the addition of the financial concerns I can totally understand why you feel as you do.

We are here for you, and I hope you will find some comfort in posting. I encourage you to check out our chat room as well. It might be a place for you to exchange information and receive additional support