Hmmmmm ....

[Depressed4Life]

People have been suggesting that I write out my 'life story' on here, but I am afraid that I will not.
I don't care if people want to understand me or not, it doesn't matter.

I am just one soul in pain, and I am but one soul who has been through a lot.

That's all.

I will probably end my life this coming winter, but no one here needs to worry or care.

[loneranger17]

Look, I'm having an extremely bad day today. But that doesn't mean I've given up on people. There is lots of people including me who care about you and is interested in your life story on this site. Whatever is bothering you, you can vent here, will listen, nobody will judge you. I've learned that after all the crazy stuff I've done and been through this year and lasts. Don't give up, I'm trying not to and so should you.
WE DO CARE!

[shmuel]

Hi depresed4life,
I`ve been through a few "I don`t care" phases in my life.. horrible lonely times ,full of undescribable anguish ...I shuddering just thinking about them.I know now that I would find it very difficult,perhaps impossible to use words to describe those times of my life.

Nevertheless,I do hope you try to share some of your pain with us here in the forums,you can also use the chat or PM too.
It doesn`t have to be long life stories... maybe just a few thoughts about why you are feeling so lost.
As loneranger17 said we do care.
There is no way out of that one I`m afraid...we are a worrying and caring bunch here
Take care you..

Communication leads to community,friendship - to understanding,closeness and mutual help.

[Emotional_77]

((((((depressed4life)))))))))) We all care and worry about everyone who comes to this site that includes you . Don't give up! We are here to help you through these hard times.

[Depressed4Life]

Thank you.
But, the truth is that I don't believe that I can be "saved."
I don't exactly feel that talking to anyone on here and sharing information about my pain for everyone to see is going to help me. You know?

I have only found one person that helps a little with the pain, and that is it, and I know from experience that talking to people - especially online - doesn't ever help.

I just wanted to let everyone know that it doesn't matter. I guess people can ask me questions, but I don't se what good that is going to do.

I'm just a confused person I guess. Nothing makes sense.

[Emotional_77]

Talk to that one person you mentioned. Maybe right now talking on the site doesnt help much but with time it might. But if it doesnt then there is always other things you can try that will work. Just don't give up,
(((((depressed4life)))))))

[TeardropJane]

Dear Depressed4life,

Sorry to put this bluntly, but death is the easy way out.
I really wanted to die so many times, and have tried a couple of times,
But I'm glad that I never got far enough to not come back,
Because things like that open you eyes, even if it's only a little bit.

I now feel guilty and selfish for even considering "the easy way out",
Because without life,
You can't hope,
You can't love,
You can't suffer,
You can't cry,
You can't smell the bacon.
Death is a big black nothingness,
(Unless you believe in religion)
So why give up colour for something you can't even be concious for?


I wish you the best of luck and give you all of my care and hope.

[Depressed4Life]

TeardropJane ... it sounds like you still have a lot to learn. I hope you discover what you need to, because your advice doesn't seem to correct.

[hey-its-ok]

there is a silver lining to every rain cloud... isn't there such a saying? please remember, it may feel terrible at this moment in life, but things will slowly change for the better, i know its hard to imagine another happy day in your life, but it WILL come, and when it comes, you will be happy that you pulled through these tough times, and it will make you stronger... hang in there, tell us a bit about what's the problem...

[Depressed4Life]

It doesn't matter what the problem is. This might be my last week on earth. Sorry if I upset anyone.
That was never my intention.
Please take care everyone.
Goodbye

[hey-its-ok]

hey.... depressed... don't.... please... things always change, things can always get better, you must pull through, talk to that someone you mentioned, what you are feeling is only temporary... things will change, you can change it...

hey... whatever you are thinking, whatever situation you are in, its not that bad i'm sure... tell us something about what's going on... you may not think its useful, but tell us anyway... you have nothing to lose... hey, let me give you a

<<<<<<<BIIIGGG>>>>>>

with a (((((((((((((((tight squeeze))))))))))))))))

hey... really, its going to be ok... just give it a bit of time, talk to me...

[shmuel]

There are times in all our lives when we feel depressed or arehaving very negative thoughts or bad times and experiences .In my bad times I also saw no reason for my exsitence.I felt useles,was useless.Nothing I did worked.. I was a loser and nearly every waking minute was a torture.Nothing around me brought relief or hope.
Deep inside my hopelessness I very slowly and painfully managed to see that I was ill...that my thoughts were not me..they were the illness , my depression.
It took all of my strength,what was left, to take the first step and see a professional,a doc.
From my experience in looking back at those times I now can see that I blew up every bad experience into a personal end of the world scenario.
Even the rare good experience was not taken seriouslly and I seemed to be content to live in my hole
I slowly became aware that it wasn`t the experiences that were ripping my joy of life away from my soul... it was me...or at least it was my thoughts and how I was handling my problems.
Having very negative thoughts over a long period of time is an illness and it needs the help of Docs or other professionals to help us reclaim our life.
...it took me a long time to visit a Doc and openly talk about my problems.
Just a few of my thoughts from my own life.. and hang around here too
Take care you You are in my thoughts.

[hey-its-ok]

There are times in all our lives when we feel depressed or arehaving very negative thoughts or bad times and experiences .In my bad times I also saw no reason for my exsitence.I felt useles,was useless.Nothing I did worked.. I was a loser and nearly every waking minute was a torture.Nothing around me brought relief or hope.
Deep inside my hopelessness I very slowly and painfully managed to see that I was ill...that my thoughts were not me..they were the illness , my depression.
It took all of my strength,what was left, to take the first step and see a professional,a doc.
From my experience in looking back at those times I now can see that I blew up every bad experience into a personal end of the world scenario.
Even the rare good experience was not taken seriouslly and I seemed to be content to live in my hole
I slowly became aware that it wasn`t the experiences that were ripping my joy of life away from my soul... it was me...or at least it was my thoughts and how I was handling my problems.
Having very negative thoughts over a long period of time is an illness and it needs the help of Docs or other professionals to help us reclaim our life.
...it took me a long time to visit a Doc and openly talk about my problems.
Just a few of my thoughts from my own life.. and hang around here too
Take care you You are in my thoughts.

hey depressed4life... what shmuel said is sooo true, please think about it, not only is your feeling a temporary thing, but the illness makes your mind blow up every small negative experience into a personal end of the world scenario... and you tend to disregard and neglect any good experiences... don't underestimate the benefits of medication and seeing a doctor... you have nothing to lose, just go see a doctor and see if anything can be done first... and keep in mind what Shmuel said... it so correctly explains your situation...

please take care....

((((((((((((((((big hugs))))))))))))))))