I feel like...

[Shealyn]

a thought occurred to me the other night while i was crying in bed. (i was trying unsuccessfully to sleep) sometimes when i try to think and ponder the reasons why i am upset i come up with nothing. actually, most of the time i come up with nothing.

so it made me think this... its like my memories were pages in a book, and they have been burned, i am left with nothing but the smoldering ashes, they just pile up inside. and every day i have to wade through them to live. they burn me, and i cannot even tell what they were to begin with. so it makes me even more frustrated and upset...

does anyone else think this makes any sense?

[Warmsoul/Jeanie13]

(((((((((((((((((( Shealyn ))))))))))))))))))))

Yes it makes sense. To get to your future, you live the past. Sometimes you want to close chapters to your past, and it is hard to do. You have tried and made some headway, still there is that small part still about.

I think we learn from out past, and we must settle whatever it is that is hanging on before we can go forward, completely.

Now I know I am not saying this right, seems confusing, even to me, but that is what I feel. Talking about things do help. Whether it is to yourself, a friend, writing it down, some manner to bring it to the surface.

Hope I gave a little insight to you and not more confusion.

Warmie

[Obayan]

They pile up when we don't deal with them. And can get overwhelming and feel like it's burying you. Ok, i can't stick with the ashes anology.... Depression is a fog. It surrounds us. It only lets in what it needs to feed and grow, not what we need. We have to deal with what is happening in order to break thru this fog and get to reality. And yes, our past can be very detrimental to that goal. But it's the sum total of our past that makes us who we are. The good and the bad. It affects who we are, how we communicate, how we act, even the partners we choose to be with. By dealing with the past, we heal the future. But don't lose track of now. I hope this helps and doesn't just confuse you more.

[MechanicalFlesh]

We're in this together buddy! I Love You and i cant wait to see you get better,you deserve it!

[Obayan]

Yes, we are all in this together. One big family here and you are a part of it now.

[Shealyn]

((((all))))
thank you mech, love you too, my friend.

and thank you obayan, i am very grateful to be accepted into this wonderful family.

[Obayan]

((( shea )))

[Warmsoul/Jeanie13]

((((((((((((((( Shealyn ))))))))))))))))))))))))

Warm hug coming your way.

Warmie

[crystalgaze]

Hi Shealyn! Here's something that might be worth thinking about, regarding your original post.

The thing about ashes is that something that is burnt can be used to produce a fruitful harvest. It need not remain scarred. Depending on the kind of scar, it can fade away significantly with time perhaps (like how it happens with your skin).

Your mentioning ashes made me think of this old farming method that was used on the land (slash and burn), strangely enough.

The pages of the book can be restored with something else--hopefully things of great light and power.

Sending you well wishes,