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Hello, I've been reading for a while, so now I feel I need to share. First off let me apologize because I feel like my problems do not compare to some others. I have had a pretty good life. Loving parents and friends and all that good stuff. 6 months ago I thought I had everything I ever wanted, a new house, a girlfriend I loved and a baby girl. Then I found out that my gf had a drug addiction and was losing her job...it didnt matter to me because I loved her so much. She has been in NA ever since and hasnt touched anything in 5 months. Three weeks ago we celebrated our 8 year anniversary. 5 days ago she told me she no longer wanted to be with me. Needless to say that is why I am here. She is the only girl I have ever loved. I cannot find joy in anything (not even my daughter, which scares the hell out of me). As I sit here typing this the tears are flowing down my cheeks. We are still nice to each other and are still living in the same house (seperate bedrooms). I cry all the time...at work, home, my parents and friends. I feel so useless and unworthy of love. I feel like this is more than a broken heart, I feel like I am broken. The tears are overwhelming me right now, so this is all I can take.
My Story
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Warmsoul/Jeanie13
- Posts: 29195
- Joined: Mon Jun 05, 2006 8:46 pm
- Contact:
(((((((((((((((((( discarded )))))))))))))))))))))
I so feel for you. Yes, been in a similar situation and the heart being broken, walked on and tossed away hurts. You have all kind of thoughts, what to do to get that part of your life back, what did you do wrong, what could you have done, loads of thoughts. You will in time realize it wasn't you, that you gave your all.
It isn't easy, but when you are forced into it all you can do is take one day at a time. Realize, you are a good person, that you have lots to give to right one. Whether it is the one you are in love with or another.
You have that wonderful child, to love, to hold, to be the best parent you can. Children love you unconditionally, I think. Channel your time, your energy, your love to her. Keep her security of 'Daddy' being there. Will help both you and her.
Sorry if I have typed the wrong words to you, just wanted you to know. The heart will eventually mend, the scars will be there, you won't forget but you will find life will go on, and you will do the same. None of this is a quick fix, but fixable in the end.
Will keep you in thoughts. Wish I could do more.
Warmie
I so feel for you. Yes, been in a similar situation and the heart being broken, walked on and tossed away hurts. You have all kind of thoughts, what to do to get that part of your life back, what did you do wrong, what could you have done, loads of thoughts. You will in time realize it wasn't you, that you gave your all.
It isn't easy, but when you are forced into it all you can do is take one day at a time. Realize, you are a good person, that you have lots to give to right one. Whether it is the one you are in love with or another.
You have that wonderful child, to love, to hold, to be the best parent you can. Children love you unconditionally, I think. Channel your time, your energy, your love to her. Keep her security of 'Daddy' being there. Will help both you and her.
Sorry if I have typed the wrong words to you, just wanted you to know. The heart will eventually mend, the scars will be there, you won't forget but you will find life will go on, and you will do the same. None of this is a quick fix, but fixable in the end.
Will keep you in thoughts. Wish I could do more.
Warmie
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shatteredhopes
- Posts: 664
- Joined: Tue Oct 27, 2009 1:39 am
- Location: U.S.
It feels like you should die from a broken heart it hurts so much, or did for me anyway. I was dumped by one I was sure was my soulmate, still hurts, but its getting easier....also I think for those us depressed or prone to depression, heartbreak is even worse than for most people....
Coupla suggestions if you don't mind...first try to order or pick up the book "How to fall out of love" by Dr. Debra Phillips....doesn't cure it all or didn't for me but helps a lot. And by the way, the 'process' in the book is reverseable if there's any hope to reconcile.
Try to find little things to comfort yourself as best you can...silly but hot baths and frozen mochas or hot chocolate comforted me and helped me get by. (((((((((Warmie)))))))) is right you just need to get by moment to moment right now. Whatever you can find some comfort in, music, writing, something good to eat, whatever works for you to soothe you a bit.
Maybe see a doctor...sometimes an anti-depressant or therapy can really help with rough patches.
Did you ever have dreams or passion for something in your life that you could return to? Something you liked to read and study about, a hobby, a faith, anything that might be a distraction and give comfort and help you move on a bit?
Do you have friends you can spend time with? Sometimes just someone to talk to and go for coffee with helps a lot. Try also the chatroom on this site maybe, many dealing with broken hearts and console each other.
So sorry for your loss ((((((((((discarded))))))))))); know how much getting dumped hurt me and I was only with the person just over a year...it shakes you to your core and affects everything it seems. Know it doesn't help now, but in time, will get more manageable and the pain won't be so overwhelming. Just do your best to be there for your daughter and comfort yourself as best you can.
Wishing you a little light and peace in your day...
Coupla suggestions if you don't mind...first try to order or pick up the book "How to fall out of love" by Dr. Debra Phillips....doesn't cure it all or didn't for me but helps a lot. And by the way, the 'process' in the book is reverseable if there's any hope to reconcile.
Try to find little things to comfort yourself as best you can...silly but hot baths and frozen mochas or hot chocolate comforted me and helped me get by. (((((((((Warmie)))))))) is right you just need to get by moment to moment right now. Whatever you can find some comfort in, music, writing, something good to eat, whatever works for you to soothe you a bit.
Maybe see a doctor...sometimes an anti-depressant or therapy can really help with rough patches.
Did you ever have dreams or passion for something in your life that you could return to? Something you liked to read and study about, a hobby, a faith, anything that might be a distraction and give comfort and help you move on a bit?
Do you have friends you can spend time with? Sometimes just someone to talk to and go for coffee with helps a lot. Try also the chatroom on this site maybe, many dealing with broken hearts and console each other.
So sorry for your loss ((((((((((discarded))))))))))); know how much getting dumped hurt me and I was only with the person just over a year...it shakes you to your core and affects everything it seems. Know it doesn't help now, but in time, will get more manageable and the pain won't be so overwhelming. Just do your best to be there for your daughter and comfort yourself as best you can.
Wishing you a little light and peace in your day...
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Warmsoul/Jeanie13
- Posts: 29195
- Joined: Mon Jun 05, 2006 8:46 pm
- Contact:
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