Forgetting/Forgetful/Forgetfulness

[crystalgaze]

Lately, I have been very forgetful. It comes & it goes, but it has been very spooky recently.

Somehow I thought I ordered something I needed. I waited. Then, I started wondering why it didn't get here yet. I search all over my email + records today to find any type of confirmation for the order. There isn't 1, but I'm convinced I really did make a purchase.

The thing is I really didn't place it. I'm still amazed I didn't do it, but I really forgot to but thought I did. Isn't that something?

I've been forgetful with other things--the usual things: turning off the fan + sometimes the pipe running in the sink (not 'cause I don't want to conserve), eatting my bread/waffle I left in the toaster. Even after I remember what I left in the toaster, I will forget it again for hours. (One time I forgot something in the toaster 3 times in 1 day.... By the time I remembered, it was late at in the evening & what I toasted was from early morning.)

I can tend to misplace things, especially my keys I don't use regularly or my wallet & end up having a serious fit turning the place upside down to find them. I've forgotten my password on here back to back, too, even though I could have sworn I wrote it down some place. (~lol~ I just can't find where I wrote it.... or maybe I thought I wrote it down, but didn't? Bummer....)

Oh man! It's something else. I don't know what to do. Any suggestions? Any one else have forgetfulness this bad or worse? I have been writing things down (when I remember or think to write down whatever it is).

My memory seems to be going to pot, but I sometimes am good at recalling what day of the week it is & the date....

The final thing that properly blew me away was that I even forgot how depressed I was or rather I didn't even realize how depressed I was the other day. I couldn't tell that something was wrong with me. My barber looked at me, asked me how I was doing & then there it was..... & I couldn't really understand because I seemed fine that day.

I knew I was a little on edge from driving that day. There was a lot of traffic & my nerves were shot. After a while of getting to the barber, I didn't feel to good but I couldn't really put my finger on what it was; I usually crash some time in the day, so I figured that's what it was, but it was more than I even noticed. I was just sitting there sort of wide-eyed/shocked because that was 1 of the days I managed to be in the middle & not out on an extreme (extremely happy or extremely sad)...

It's just plain puzzling.

[aim]

Well, crystal, I have to tell you that when my anxiety is at an all-time high, I forget everything! All I can even begin to focus on is my stress, so everything else just kind of goes right out the window...

Forgetting you're depressed - that doesn't sound like too bad of a deal though!! Please tell more about that one...

[crystalgaze]

~lol~ Yes, I know! It was WEIRD! I don't even know how I managed to do that!

I have been trying to relax & not be as high-powered + intense as I usually am. It's sort of like learning to be happy with myself--just me & all that I am & not want something from an external source (particularly like a boyfriend/husband since I know I'm not ready for that).

I've been really trying at that (so long as I remember) & trying to be happy within myself--from me--to avoid doing something as escapism whether it's playing video or card games, putting on music & so on.....

It's tough, but maybe a part of it is that I've just been turning off from stuff. I am mostly turned off from people where I live & where I live itself. What I mean is I don't really pay any of it any attention really. I think here is pretty in its own way & I can appreciate that. That's what I've been trying to do for now & try to organize my space again for the umpteenth time to see if I can make something work....

Oh yes.... I guess I should say it this way: I'm pulling a Tim Dunn, a "make it work" so to speak.... (~lol~ Thank you Project Runway.)

[aim]

I am a big believer in making ourselves whole before we can give our whole selves to another person, gaze. I think you have a hell of a lot of insight into many things... don't ever stop looking inside of yourself, but please do remember that you are only human, ok? Don't be too hard on yourself...

[crystalgaze]

Thanks Amy! You're right. The forgetfulness has been a little better so far this week. I'm glad.

I have been very incoherent when I wake up lately, though. I guess this is the spice of life?

It's so amazing. I feel lost.... like I almost wouldn't know who I was or how I got wherever I was.

I'm just rolling with it, though.

[aim]

I bump into things when I first wake up. Just a fact of who I am, I guess. Don't read too much into everything, ok, Gaze? It will literally drive you crazy! Take it from a hypochondriac like me - it's very very damaging and painful to always think that you are ill. I'm getting through it now, with the help of talking to my fiance and the medication that I am on, but it is always buried inside me somewhere. Keep fighting that, Gaze. TRUST ME!!

[crystalgaze]

Update: The forgetfulness has almost gone away entirely.... I use lists also to help with it....

[Monty]

Hi,

I was having (and still do) a lot of problem with remembering things. I used to be so good at remembering names and now I am lucky if I get my own right (a slight exaggeration).

When I mentioned it to my psychiatrist he told me that I was probably just overwhelmed with things. With so much going on there is only so much room for my memory to retain things that it is just all used up.

He said that when things settled down that I would notice a big improvement. For me I think that I am tending to panic too much about stuff and the cogs are meeting properly up there.

I thing that I plan to remember is how to get to this site. You all mean a lot to me.

[James101]

Through my reading about depression I have learned that forgetfullness is a symptom of depression. Apparently, the stress hormones such as cortisol attack the hippocampus which is associated with memory recall in the brain causing it to shrink.

The good news is that it has been shown to regain size as the depression lifts through neurogenisis. In other words your memory will recover eventually.

James

[crybaby1086]

Hi Crystal, I have been having this problem too lately. I forget where I put things, what I'm doing (like I go to another room for somehing and forget why once I get there) and I often lose my words. I'm talking to someone and I literally can't rember words. I was planning on making an appointment with my doctor later this week. I get kind of worried because not only do I suffer from depression but I have also had two concussions in the fairly recent past.

[crystalgaze]

Hi there crybaby. You sound like you are on the right track by making that doctor's appointment. It might be worth a look.

[aim]

A lot of times serious anxiety can cause you to forget things... I know that when I am at my most anxious, I can't remember a thing. Seeing a doctor is always recommended, but please do keep that in mind all. Stress can do strange things to the body and mind, and anxiety is the most severe form of stress, in my humble little opinion.

[crystalgaze]

I did put a waffle in the toaster a while ago & I forgot about it, but I just remembered....

[Misty]

((((crystalgaze))))
Sounds familiar, .
I looked in the fridge for a dinner plate the other day.

We all have those type moments, hey we're human as human can be.

Misty

[crystalgaze]

I have been pretty forgetful lately.... Sometimes in mid sentence, sometimes even about stuff I was saying/thinking a second or two ago....

The worst of it has been forgetting my passwords and such....

Well.... I'm mad at myself because last night I forgot my bottle of yogurt drink (mostly full) and my vanilla chai tea (mostly empty) smoothie out on the kitchen counter....

I only realized it just a short while ago.... ~lol~ I know I must try to get better again....