ups and downs

[helium]

I've been dealing with depression since tha age of 14.
I can't say that I've been experiencing the same intenstity of depression over the years. Last year I was finally brave enough to seek help from a professional. I took cymbalta and went to therapy. I stopped going to therapy and taking the meds because I managed to feel somehow stable despite of the external problems I was facing. Recently I've been experiencing my low mood again. It is not constant, so I can't say I'm still suffering from depression. It is not as intense, but I'm noticing that it is getting more frequent. I'm afraid I'm relapsing again and I honestly can't tell anyone about it. Everyone seems to be so relieve that I was getting better.

I'm just tired of dealing with my low mood. I don't know how long I'll be strong enough to keep fighting it.

Hortensia.

[Aurelia5]

Hortensia dear~

There is what people in the mental disorders world called The Revolving Door syndrome. Say you are depressed, you go to a shrink, get Cymbalta, and they start making you feel good in about a month. And then you feel so good that you think you don't need them anymore. So you quit taking them, and the depression returns. The reason you feel good enough to stop taking them is that they are working. I know it feels like you've gotten over your depression, but your type of depression is biological - you have a chemical imbalace in your brain that needs Cymbalta. Just like if you've got fair skin and you need sunscreen. You wouldn't go out without it because you know you need it to not get burned. Well, ths SSRI family of drugs is the same. You need it to not get depressed.

Cymbalta is good. I take it too. It has fewer side effects than any others I've tried. And besides MAO inhibitors and ECT (eledtroconvulsive therapy,which Monty can attest to, it is not the horrifying torture you see on tv.) I've tried them all.

Oh, and if you have tried almost all the others, the SSRIs, like Prozac, Wellbutrin, Paxil, Zoloft, Effexor etc., then the insureance will pay for it. They want you to go through all the other ones first. I had to call them up and explain that to my insurance company the other day, but they were fine with accepting it after I went down the list of what I've tried.

So start up on the Cymbalta again, and you'll be feeling better soon.

If you have any other questions about the drugs for depression, let me know and I'll give you the info straight out of the drug guides.

Best wishes to you ~


A5

[crystalgaze]

Hi Hortensia!

I know how you feel. I'm going through what you described now. I've been depressed since about age 9. It became pronounced around 14.

A5 has said it best.

Take care & be brave again.

[Monty]

Hi Hortensia,

Sorry that things aren't going well.

I am afraid that I have to agree with a5. It is pretty well documented that people feel depressed, go to the doctor, get on meds, start feeling good (not realizing that the reason that they are feeling good is because of the drugs), go off the drugs, feel ok for a while, then drop back into the depression.

I wish that this story wasn't true.

A couple of years ago, around this time of year, I was very ill. I was so sick that the decision was made for me to have ECT administered (I am in no way suggesting that you are in the situation ECT would be indicated).

It made the world of difference to my whole being. Now I am starting to have the depression creep (good word to decribe depression) back into my life, and I am afraid to tell anyone. I was doing really well for a couple of years. Like you said, everyone was so happy, I am afraid to tell them that I need help again. It is like I might go to the well too often.

I have found this forum very helpful for keeping things altogether. We are all in the same boat. Keep writing if you can. Sometimes things feels like the load is a little lighter if you can share it.

Maybe if you can let us know a little more about you, we can maybe work together, bouncing some ideas around that might help you.

Pretty late here. Hope you all sleep well.

[bluesky1]

You may be experiencing early signs of relapse. Usually people stay on meds for depression after an episode for a defined period of time and then wean gradually under medical supervision. Its good that you have noticed the changes in your mood. You should consider getting medical attention as soon as possible as you may be in the early stages of developing another episode of depression. Best wishes,