Hillbilly Medical Terms
Benign - What you be after you be eight
Bacteria - Back door to cafeteria
Barium - What you do with dead folks
Cesarean Section - A neighborhood in Rome
Catscan - Searching for the cat
Cauterize - Made eye contact with her
Colic - A sheep dog
Coma - A punctuation mark
D&C - Where Washington is
Dilate - To live longer than your kids do
Enema - Not a friend
Fester - Quicker than someone else
Fibula - A small lie
GI Series - World Series of military baseball
Hangnail - What you hang your coat on
Hospital - The biggest building in town, other than Joe's feed warehouse, or Franks lumber mill
Labor Pain - Getting hurt at work
Morbid - A higher offer than I bid
Medical Staff - A Doctor's cane, sometimes shown with a snake
Nitrates - Cheaper than day rates
Node - I knew it
Outpatient - A person who has fainted
Pap Smear - A fatherhood test
Pelvis - Second cousin to Elvis
Post Operative - A letter carrier
Recovery Room - Place to do upholstery
Secretion - Hiding something
Seizure - Roman emperor who lived in the Ceasarean Section
Tablet - A small table to change babies on
Terminal Illness - Getting sick at the train station
Tumor - More than one
Urine - Opposite of mine
Varicose - Near by
