things are getting better!
Moderators: Sunlily92, windsong, BlueGobi, Moderators, Astrid
things are getting better!
I wrote a post on this a while ago called "16 and I don't know what to do anymore" but im getting alot better and adjusting to life. The only thing that kills me is the flash backs I get aonetimes of my dad screaming for help and crying to me and it kills me but everyday is a challenge and it will get easier, im just happy I see hope and a future. I worry about my brother whos physically exshausting himself working 4jobs so that he is always busy so he doesn't have to think of whats happened. He feels hes the man of the house now and he needs to no its ok to be sad. I relied on my boyfriend alot to make me happy ehich I feel bad for because I feel now I depend him on ny happiness and I shouldn't I need to healthy try and get better but it will all be okay in time. I burned all bad nemories I could think of in a fire in my garden to try and forget it and move towards the future.
flonug, I'm seeing many positive things in your post.
Some people might think burning bad memories is reactive, but I think it is concrete statement that you won't let them clutter your present. Most people have too many physical artifacts (both bad and good) which hold them in the grip of the past. It's a big issue with me. So I recognize yours as an act of strength.
The fact, that you realize your reliance on your boyfriend makes you vulnerable, is wisdom. I think it's important to know that any partnership entails vulnerability. I think it's equally important (perhaps more) to be honest and open about vulnerabilities with each other. I think that's a scary thing about relationships and where many of them become secretive and convoluted.
Relying on your partner is part of what gives the partnership strength. At the same time it's important to use the strengths you have to support him also. You have strengths. Sometimes they are hard to see. It helps to look closely at what you think are your weaknesses; because generally your weaknesses are equally your strengths. They are your character.
I haven't mentioned your Brother partly because You are your priority and your partnership. Then comes your Brother. He is another relationship but not your first. If somehow I have this wrong, and your words mean that you longer have your boyfriend, then everything I said still applies. For any relationship, you have to see to your own welfare, you need to relate openly, you need to try look at what it means to share equally. My apologies if I'm assuming too much or being too assertive.
Frame
Some people might think burning bad memories is reactive, but I think it is concrete statement that you won't let them clutter your present. Most people have too many physical artifacts (both bad and good) which hold them in the grip of the past. It's a big issue with me. So I recognize yours as an act of strength.
The fact, that you realize your reliance on your boyfriend makes you vulnerable, is wisdom. I think it's important to know that any partnership entails vulnerability. I think it's equally important (perhaps more) to be honest and open about vulnerabilities with each other. I think that's a scary thing about relationships and where many of them become secretive and convoluted.
Relying on your partner is part of what gives the partnership strength. At the same time it's important to use the strengths you have to support him also. You have strengths. Sometimes they are hard to see. It helps to look closely at what you think are your weaknesses; because generally your weaknesses are equally your strengths. They are your character.
I haven't mentioned your Brother partly because You are your priority and your partnership. Then comes your Brother. He is another relationship but not your first. If somehow I have this wrong, and your words mean that you longer have your boyfriend, then everything I said still applies. For any relationship, you have to see to your own welfare, you need to relate openly, you need to try look at what it means to share equally. My apologies if I'm assuming too much or being too assertive.
Frame
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 144 guests