The Battle Rounds: Depression 3 - Katie 0

[memyselfandi]

So basically over the past week everything that could possibly go wrong has done!

First thing to kick the week off was my boss telling me I was no longer needed at my job and my last day would be in a weeks time.

Second thing my boyfriend if 2 years has basically decided that my "illness" is too much stress to handle and that now we can no linger be together and it's better that we take some time apart until I'm "all better"
Third thing I got a debt letter saying I owe 200 pound to tmobile so a phone I've not used in over a year!


So to some this shit up I'm broke/jobless in debt that I can't afford to pay off and I'm now all alone in my darkness

I mean I don't believe in god but I swear if he is true the bastard is throwing very sign my way that I have no reason to even stick around in this shit world anymore.

I mean his playing some messed up mind games with me this week and I tap out I'm not in the mood for 3 rounds this the arsehole I've taken about as much a I can bare right now !!

Stressed out under pressure alone and in a dark dark place

How Sony fight my way back I don't think I have the energy have been beaten batter and bruised my dysfunctional life.

I'm scare of my own mind...

This is shit!!

[fallen]

sorry you are having a bad time.
in my experience all things happen for a reason,a new job could crop up taking you in a different direction ,you may find a new boyfriend who actually understands your darkness.
struggling with the darkness it can feel futile but it makes us stronger in the long run.
know that some one is hoping only the best for you.
take care and be kind to your self.

[dougsan]

Katie, just when I am convinced life can't be as bad as I perseve it to be I read your post. What a load to be dumped on you at one time. My daughter, 52, hit a place like you have and she "found god". I think she's worse for having "found" someone to blame all her trials and tribulations on. We own our lives, good or bad. If we are fortunate enough to have friends, we can lean on them and they'll help us through the dark times. Unfortunately for us, the depressed, people don't tend to like depressed people, confusing us with whiners. You don't sound like a whiner. I know I'm not but I am very negative, as a result of my depression. Keeping my negativity inside except for this forum helps me to maintain a friend or two. It's an idea if you think you have that problem. A great help for me is reading the stories and conversations in this forum. I know here that I'm not alone and I am not unfriendly. I hope this forum proves helpful for you.

[blackjewelwolf]

Wow, that sounds like a bad week. Still like fallen said it might help to try and take advantage of all this. If your boyfriend was too stressed out by your depression then maybe it's time to move on and find someone who understands. Or stay single for a while, up to you. Hope it works out