Bubbling and Babies

[postnatalymessedup]

From what I can remember of my life so far I have always been depressed - it sounds clishay I know but it's true... however it's only in the past 12 months or so that I relised how bad it was really getting especially when I discovered I was pregnant in Oct 2008.

I am not going to lie and say that I wish it hadn't happened because honestly sometimes I do ... but I also belive that he is the best thing that's ever happened to me. However since he was born my depression seems to have gotten worse, then the doctor put me on anti depressants and things don't seem much better. For example now im sleeping for between 8 - 10 hours a night and still feeling tired and the limited sex drive i had has compleatly disapeared and add to that the fact that I seem to have developed an obsession with buying things..... things are a bit crazy at the min...

I joined this site in hopes that someone might understand / or have experianced what i am going through and can offer some advice - so if you can then speak to me people, i'm all ears.

[xn728]

welcome to the forum ,im sure you will have many replys soon stay with us its a good place here xn728

[lisalou]

hiya,welcome to the site,sorry to hear things are so bad for you at the moment. i always have total respect for people who raise kids whilst suffering depression as i work in a nursery and know how hard it can be. i only do 3 hours a day now as have been really ill with my depression lately and even that drains me so well done you and give yourself a huge pat on the back for raising a baby 24/7!!! it is really demanding work so don't beat yourself up for sleeping much more and feeling low. have you tried going to mother and baby coffee mornings and music groups and stuff so you can chat to other mums about how hard it is and get out of the house and ease the pressure of being 1 to 1 with your baby all the time? there are often support groups specifically for women with postnatal depression so look at what's around in your area on the internet and in newspapers. hopefully joining this website will be as helpful for you as it has for me,we're a very lovely bunch here!!!!

love lisa (age 28, brighton ,uk)

[Mich]

I am sorry you are struggling right now. Even though my kids are now in their early teens, I remember how demanding it was to have a baby that needs you 24/7. I know that this would be very hard to do whilst battling depression. If things don't seem much better on the anti-d, maybe you should speak to your doctor about trying another one. It took me several before I found one that did anything for me so sometimes you have to be a bit patient with it....I know it's hard. You could also tell your doctor about your sex drive concerns as certain anti-d's kill your sex life more than others. Maybe you could try one with less of an effect. I hope you'll keep posting and let us know how you are doing. We are here to support you and I think that you'll find a very good group here.

[postnatalymessedup]

Thanks for all the kind words - it is nice to know that there are people who get what i'm trying to say... no matter how trivial it may be. Because that is one of the major problems today - everyone knows about depression but refuses to talk about it.

[lisalou]

unfortunately that is all too true,i find a lot of people are more comfortable fussing over me if i have a cold or something rather than the small matter of the ongoing apocalypse in my brain. many people say 'i don't know what to say' but i actually respect that more than people who say completely unhelpful or insensitive things!

[Monty]

I am sorry that things aren't going well for you. Like other have said, there is no more difficult a job than being a mom.

I also had been depressed for many years. I did ok after the birth of my son but when his sister came along, it was a different story.

It hadn't been necessary to deal with my earlier depression, I had been depressed and had such low-self esteem in my younger years but it hadn't been as debilitating as it was after the birth. It was a deep depression that I finally had to seek medical intervention.

Been suffering for a long time (and I insist on using the word, suffer, when talking of anyone who is enduring a mental illness). Yes, a lot of the time I have had to deal with duds that are my recovery. Fortunately it turns out that I have had several therapists that have, not with exaggeration, saved my life. I was very sick, for a very long time.

I didn't mean this to be a story of my life, I just wanted to let you know that being a mom to your son, in spite of all the other stuff that is going on in your life, is a fantastic accomplishment. My children are now adults but I can still remember how hard it was just to make supper.

It is also very true that AD are a big sex drive killer. I have often said that I never, ever want to have sex again. In regards to the sleep, my goodness you are taking care of a little one 24 hours a day. Often I think that mothers of young children are just doing well if they manage to get up in the morning and get dressed. All of the rest is just grazy.

As many have said in posts to the forum. You are in a safe place here to let out whatever is going on in your life, or that is in your heart. We listen.

It would be a good idea to just go to your doctor, and just tell just level with him/her and tell them what is going on in your life. They can't read minds and the more info that you give them the more help (hopefully) they can give to your specific issues.