Looking for feedback on an idea

[Alaska1958]

It was a year ago this August that my wife and I split up. One big problem that I had to deal with over the winter was living alone. I had the idea that maybe, if I had the resources, I could start a group home for depresives. One thing I really missed when I was alone was not having anyone around to help keep me from focusing on myself so much. During the last year we were together I used to get the kids up in the mornings, fix them and their mom breakfast and lunch, run errands, do laundry, stuff like that. I liked doing it, even for my wife, who by then I knew I didn't love and who didn't love me. Please understand that it didn't keep me from being depressed. Whenever I wasn't actually doing something, I just sat there in a depressed stuper. I'm sure that's a big part of the reason why my wife through me out.

So anyway I wonder if having a group home for people like me, would be a good thing or would we tend to feed on each other's depression and maybe we'd all be worse off. Duringthose dark days of last winter, laying in bed all day and night was not good for me. Some days I was able to get up and out, some days I didn't hardly get up at all.

Let me know what you think. Thanks

[Frame]

As much as I struggle with depression, I also know that depression is a reaction and has a root cause. With chronic depression, that root obviously has taken over our lives and affected how we interact with our environment. Clearly seeing, much less addressing the root is a life's work.

That said; the causes of depression are different in everyone. And in Asian countries there are group homes for people like us where we can learn to see, accept, and change root causes in our personality. They are monasteries, and they give people a safe place to live and work on changing their lives at the core.

Unfortunately, here in the West, culture doesn't value a humans inner core. We concentrate on carving pathologies out in chunks, slapping labels on them, and attacking symptoms. So most of our group homes are concerned less with long term personal growth than they are in keeping the group from infecting society outside.

And again, That said; there are communities that often coalesce and grow, which are concerned with the whole person and living in harmony. They are usually centered around a person with very strong beliefs (like a church) and require some sort of commitment. They can sometimes look like a cult, sometimes like a charity, but if we look for the one's that are growing and are not founded on secrecy, we often find a community such as you speak of.

[Frame]

By the way Alaska, I think it's a great idea. Maybe one who's time has come.

And when a need arises, I believe nature fills the need. Which means someone is already focusing on a community such as this or there will be soon.

So keep your eye's open and Let us know what you find. It may be a great resource.

[bigron4570]

I have finally come to determine that i have found the root cause of my depression the reason i am so sure that it is the root cause is i have done alot of intense thought about all and every event in my life and with that is how i come to determine my root cause of my depression.In a nut shell i will try to explaine.I am 45 and all my life i have been very obiese i never really had that much of a problem with it but others did.See growing up i had been called and heard every fat joke and been called every fat name that anybody can think of my self esteem on a level of 1 to 10 is at about a 2 im not looking for pittie im just explaining that when people kept telling me how fat ugly disgusting i was for all them years i truley feel thats what drove me into this deep depression and anxiety with social phobia.I am now on a diet it is working i have dropped around 140 pounds in the last year and a half and i am still working on it.I also am now disabled and have a limited abilty for getting around so that dont help me feel any better.But anyway im positive that all the hatred towards me being so obiese is for sure the root cause of my depression..

[Alaska1958]

Growing up I was always the biggest kid in class. I was overweight, but also through 6th grade I was also the tallest. When I was in 10th grade I hit a high point of 260 pounds and was five feet ten inches tall. I got a little disgusted with myself and went on a series of fasts. I have never been really good at dieting and found it easier to not eat at all rather than control my diet through more conventional ways. Over the next two years I grew to six feet two inches and kept my weight down around 220 pounds. Not bad by my standar. I was definitely picked on as a kid and it hurt. The weight was certainly part of it, but what I found even worse was the confrontational encounters. Other boys would test me, see if they could push me around and they could. I have always avoided any kind of fight. I'm very meek by nature, as was my dad. You can be a meek adult without it being a big deal, but if you're the biggest guy in school it can make life hell.

[saragupta]

Hello Alaska
I think ur idea is great! I mean only a wounded person can understand the pain of other's pain. Ryt?
But every coin has its two faces.
Depression never comes alone. It brings frustration and irritation along with itself. So to make this great idea work, everyone who are living together must deal with patience and empathy with each other.

Keep up the spirit and keep trying to find out ways to make ur life better.

[xken728]

XN728. taken by deppression at the age of seven ,the dark shape that appeared in my bedroom doorway that night 47 years ago ,is with me now in everything i do , it often shows me the past, is here with me in the present and can and does show me the future .
It can make me blind to all that is good in my life ,i have a wonderful wife and two grown up daughters .
My life hasn,t been easy mainly due to my own fault ,driven by the dark hand of my constant sentinal .I have much love around me i want for nothing ,but the darkness that lives within me will never let me go ,
So be careful on your journeys because it knows what you are thinking,
and it will make you suffer .live with it and not against it ,and what of me ,
We,ll Clinical deppression with ptsd ,and im classed as medication in
effective .So when its bad ,its really bad ,
I was in a group once run by the NHS ,around twelve people attended
we were asked to tell the group how we felt ,a few spoke before me ,and then i told them how it was for me ,most in the room were upset ,and 3 said they felt like frauds after hearing how i felt .
So maybe a group meeting may be a negative thing i dont know .
im just telling you my expeirience ,but it is good to talk sometimes ,and then there are times when the world seems such a bad place i dont want to open my eyes .I Love my Wife and two girls so very much ,It is only they that keep me alive ....... xken728