Head injury to heartbreak

[hapydaz01]

Hey everyone, I want to let people know that I spent some time reading some of the stories on here and my heart goes out to all of you. I also struggle with depression. Some days are worse than others. Today's a bad day.
I was going to respond to a few but I'm at a loss for words. I believe that you probably have heard it all before and what I could say probably won't be any different. This happens quite a bit. I know for me I try to take one day at a time. This week and today i'm taking one hour at a time.

Well here is my story, 30 year old female, married, unemployed & broken. I lost my job last fall. I've done a few part time gigs but nothing seems to be panning out. Without going into to much identifying detail, I suffered a head injury 5 years ago while on the job as a social worker. One of my clients attacked me and beat me up. It took me years to recover physically and mentally. My passion for helping others is lost and I'm left angry and hurt that others didn't support me much during those difficult years. My employer didn't help much at the time and just fired me because I couldn't perform they way I used to.
I feel that after that head injury my depression got worse and it takes longer for me to "snap" out of it. Currently I have no health insurance and without any job prospects I don't see me getting it in the future any time soon.
My message I'm trying to send is hope. Hope that tomorrow will bring it's blessings.
As I go for job interviews it's difficult to put on a smile. I have a difficult time trusting business owners and I feel all are selfish and greedy. I'm tired of people saying that they will "pray for me". Because lets face it, that basically means that: I'm going to say, I'll pray for you and that will put those icky feelings in a box and put it away.
I'm not a well educated Christian and i'm currently working my way throught the bible. It's kind of the only things that keeps me going. I have an enormous amount of love that I would want to give others but when it comes down to it, I dont' want to get hurt.
Now currently I feel as others around me don't want to see me successful. Nobody has helped me in any job prospects even though I've ask. I feel that happens a lot when someone is depressed they reach their hand out but for whatever reason the receiving end turns away.

To everyone on this forum I want to reach my hand out and say your not alone, even though it feels like it. I'm thankful that I have this place to speak my peace. As I can't afford a psychologist right now.

I pray that there is hope in you to give it another day. Thanks for listening.

[nenkohai]

HD

You're story touched a chord (cord?) in me.

I look forward to reading more of your thoughts on here.

NK