Feeling Invaded

[crystalgaze]

I recognized recently that I feel invaded when people are near the window or can see in to a room where I am.

In the backroom, if the neighbor is cutting the grass/pruning the hedge on the little hill, I'll feel uncomfortable or like something just got ruined. Today, I actually moved out of the room because I felt bothered.

Now I will explain a little bit, since no knows the layout of the house. So it's:

empty lot/corner-------> the house ------> neighbor's driveway/embankment to a semi-empty lot

Although there are some trees on the lawn next to the neighbor's driveway, it still feels like the neighbor can see right in or see whatever movement & hear everything, which is why I would feel invaded.

I do feel invaded quite a lot--physically (people coming too close), situationally (people being pushy), etc. but I do know that there are ways to curb/stop those things, even if it means standing wider &/or standing sideways in a line (for example).

[Jaymn]

I feel like that alot. I couldn't put a word with it until you explained it- Invaded. I know how it feels. Not exactly how you feel but alot like it.
I'm not trying to diagnose or say what you should do. I think it could be anxiety making you feel like that? I get kind of paranoid and anxious when I feel like that. It could be depression too- Do you agitation when your like this?

[crystalgaze]

Well, I don't feel agitated when it happens. I just feel annoyed. I'll explain further.... You see, my room has always been to the front of the house. If someone stands where the front porch is, but close to my window, they WILL see into the room (e.g. when the man cuts the grass or someone stops by). There is really no place to put the bed, away from a window. Since there is a possibility for bugs to be on the wall (centipedes) because I live in the tropics, I can't jam the bed against the wall.

In the case of the neighbor whose driveway is next to the house, the neighbor plus the people who visit her have been trying to engage me for a while. They've invited my family to get-togethers, but I NEVER go, so the neighbor, et al don't get a chance to talk to me personally to ask me my business.

The same thing is happening right now with the construction workers outside, building the neighbor's house across the street. One, in particular, seems to want to pull his quick little number & can't 1st because I don't really bother with them to begin with, since I feel they are no good (e.g. throwing trash all over the place, talking insanely loud/shouting at the top of their lungs for absolutely no legitimate reason since they're usually working in the SAME SPOT, etc.), & 2nd they don't usually see me much anyway.

The minute I am outside they workers find a way to look. My Dad & I have caught them looking. It is uncomfortable because I feel that with the way they are scrutinizing the house, it's as though they'll try to rob the place. & no it's not paranoia. That's what the workers do a lot of the time, just sit & watch the house. It's just irks me.

Another reason for feeling invaded is that we virtually live on a corner. You hear EVERYTHING on the corner. I even leave most of the windows closed down, so the noise is muffled. A lot of times cars like to stop on the corner, & our driveway is about 2 arm's length or so from where the car would be parked, just off the road.

The invasion doesn't stop there. I find that people don't know how to leave other people alone. & it's not like the folk are genuine. It's about them doing what they want, when they want how they want & don't care about who gets affected. If they don't are not up in your business, they are not happy. I keep to myself where I live because I know people can't be trusted. Also, they have no intention of telling me their business & even if they were going to, I don't want to know. [/i]

[Djkatscan]

I feel the same way! My apartment is on the first floor and near a side entrance to the building. When people go outside to smoke, or kids come out to play I feel very uncomfortable that they may look inside the window or hear what I am doing, check out my goodies in my house, ect. I have a fish tank near the window, so some kids have done this in the past looking at the fish, and I know they are only children but it bothers me.

[Warmsoul/Jeanie13]

(((((((((((( crystalgaze ))))))))))))

I have 'sheer' curtains on my windows. They let the light in but you can't see into the house. These curtains were more expensive but well worth the cost. At night I close the drapes and that gives me the privacy I need.

Do understand your feelings, felt the same, but now this balances it out.

Warmie

[mpal050]

Oh man, do I understand! I don't like coming out of my room when my flatmates are about, unless it's night time, then I'll gladly join them to watch T.V! Totally irrational as the night is outside.....

[crystalgaze]

Something I found out that was a little interesting.....

One day recently, out of the blue, this guy walked up to my Dad & started questioning him about me. After he gave the general line, the guy continued, & that's when my Dad said, "There is 1 thing my daughter doesn't like, & it's me talking her business."

That's what cooled out the guy. Now here's the clincher. The guy is someone that I don't know. That's 1 strike. Apparently, the guy worked with my Dad briefly. The two did not work together & were not on such a personal level. That's the 2nd strike. 3rd strike is what I end up thinking in my head, which is "Dang, that dirty **** is NOSY!!" (He was already "out" from the 1st strike, though.)

& I'm sure he doesn't/wouldn't mean me any good anyway. Can you imagine?

[Warmsoul/Jeanie13]

(((((((((((((((( Crystal )))))))))))))))))

You are keeping your distances with him, wish move.

Warmie