Alcoholic, depressed boyfriend with gaming addiction?

[PurpleTalisman]

Hello,

I am writing to try to get some light or advice with the situation that I am experiencing now.

My partner (31 from the US) and I (30, from Chile) have been together for 3 years. We live together for 2 years and he has been depressed for about a year already. I try to support him, but it doesn't seem to come though as support. He thinks I do not understand him, that I do not love him as I should, that I do not offer the support he needs. When I try to bring up my feelings he has told me that I am mean, that I am stupid, that I am boring and that I am just selfish. I am very confused.

I joined online-therapy because I am thinking that I have issues in the way I communicate, because whenever I try to offer some love and support I get anger and resentment back.

Lately things are pretty bad. He has pushed away all friendships. All he does is drink until he is drunk enough to fall asleep, smoke weed, order junkfood and play video games or scroll his phone. He refuses to clean the house or even tidy up after himself. He doesn't have a job, he is not trying to study, or really do anything in order to have a sustainable life.

I am the one paying for all the bills, even though I have a minimum wage job where I earn just enough to get by. I am the one cleaning, getting the house into a living space, cooking, doing grocery shopping, studying on the side, and basically the one keeping things a little together. And I honestly feel a little crazy. I wake up fearing what am I going to do wrong to make him upset. Sometimes me just looking at him can trigger some kind of fight. I am afraid of saying something that will make him more upset.

He is been treating me with such unkindness, that I don't know if is the depression, is the alcohol or if he just hates me.

The therapist that is advising me doesn't want to focus on him so much, as she wants to focus on my own growth. And I get that, but I want to help him. And I feel clueless. I ask him to please go to a therapist, but he doesn't think it will work. He would never take medications to get out of the depression.

All he cares about are video games, all day, all night. I don' t know how he can sustain himself if it wasn't for me. I would love to encourage him to try to study something, to volunteer, workout or do anything. But he won't listen. He thinks that there is nothing wrong to just behaving like a 13 year old.

I love him and I know if he would get some treatment life would be way more fulfilling. He is a talented person, he is very creative and super smart but nothing seems to excite him anymore.

How can I guide him to get help without being too pushy?

Whoever is reading this, thank you. I appreciate your time so much.

[Elisabeth75]

Hello,

I am writing to try to get some light or advice with the situation that I am experiencing now.

My partner (31 from the US) and I (30, from Chile) have been together for 3 years. We live together for 2 years and he has been depressed for about a year already. I try to support him, but it doesn't seem to come though as support. He thinks I do not understand him, that I do not love him as I should, that I do not offer the support he needs. When I try to bring up my feelings he has told me that I am mean, that I am stupid, that I am boring and that I am just selfish. I am very confused.

I joined online-therapy because I am thinking that I have issues in the way I communicate, because whenever I try to offer some love and support I get anger and resentment back.

Lately things are pretty bad. He has pushed away all friendships. All he does is drink until he is drunk enough to fall asleep, smoke weed, order junkfood and play video games or scroll his phone. He refuses to clean the house or even tidy up after himself. He doesn't have a job, he is not trying to study, or really do anything in order to have a sustainable life.

I am the one paying for all the bills, even though I have a minimum wage job where I earn just enough to get by. He work on a miel de jujubier company. I am the one cleaning, getting the house into a living space, cooking, doing grocery shopping, studying on the side, and basically the one keeping things a little together. And I honestly feel a little crazy. I wake up fearing what am I going to do wrong to make him upset. Sometimes me just looking at him can trigger some kind of fight. I am afraid of saying something that will make him more upset.

He is been treating me with such unkindness, that I don't know if is the depression, is the alcohol or if he just hates me.

The therapist that is advising me doesn't want to eat pot 7 guerisons and the costus indien, he want to focus on him so much, as she wants to focus on my own growth. And I get that, but I want to help him. And I feel clueless. I ask him to please go to a therapist, but he doesn't think it will work. He would never take medications to get out of the depression.

All he cares about are video games, all day, all night and when he eat some dattes ajwa. I don' t know how he can sustain himself if it wasn't for me. I would love to encourage him to try to study something, to volunteer, workout or do anything. But he won't listen. He thinks that there is nothing wrong to just behaving like a 13 year old.

I love him and I know if he would get some treatment life would be way more fulfilling. He is a talented person, he is very creative and super smart but nothing seems to excite him anymore.

How can I guide him to get help without being too pushy?

Whoever is reading this, thank you. I appreciate your time so much.

I don't have the solution, but I can only wish you good luck...

[Prycejosh1987]

It seems they are all addictions and stem from mentality. Depression comes from triggers, alcohol stems from coping with the depression, and gaming stems from coping with depression. If he can cure the depression and cut off the triggers then he will find power to overcome his alcohol and gaming issues. Good luck, its your job as his partner to help him with this, what you will get out of it, is a more powerful relationship with him. Its worth investing in.

[CamGirl]

You need to take care of your own mental health. Only you can tell how much more you can take. Stay strong.

[jackiehair59]

I am a wife of an alcoholic it is very hard to live with so I understand your anguish. We have been married for 26 years and 10 of those have been destroyed by him drinking. I continue to battle with this daily, hence I suffer from depression and taking medication for it. I understand your battle, but don't be a doormat to your other half, stay strong!

[jassim]

Hi im a 14 years old boy and im suffering with depression with my family if anyone can help me talk to me please help me im giving up everyday

[pattephip]

It's sad to read that and to know that I was in a similar situation. I'm entirely sorry this happened to you, and I'm also sorry for your boyfriend, who is going through a difficult stage in his life. I think you should refer him to a therapist, as well as try to get him signed up for a course at https://www.theluckiestclub.com/join-community so people with similar situations can open his eyes. As I've found in my experience, until I have someone with an addiction like me talking to me, I won't take in the information. I understand how horrible and sad it is, but if your guy is the same way, you should turn him over to professionals for a solution.

[Burntouted]

This isn't any relationship that anyone should be in.
It's unhealthy. It's toxic and dysfunctional.
He's unhealthy. You're unhealthy.
He isn't healthy enough to be in any relationship..right now.. possibly never.

You're not healthy enough to be in any relationship...right now .. possibly ever.


Both of you need to work on yourselves apart from each other... individually in therapy.




Both of you need to know what a healthy relationship is, and should be like.

Both of you have self esteem, self respect, self dignity, self love issues that need to be worked on away from each other and in therapy.


You don't know your true worth, and what you are truly deserving of.


Being in a relationship with an alcoholic depressed boyfriend with a gambling problem who's possibly using you...will never work out.


It was doomed from the start.

Get out before the alcoholism, the gambling, and depression gets worse.....trust me it will get worse.


Get out before he starts being violent, abusive, and stealing/conning you out of money.


Sorry. But it needs to end.

[myriam27]

Hello,

I am writing to try to get some light or advice with the situation that I am experiencing now.

My partner (31 from the US) and I (30, from Chile) have been together for 3 years. We live together for 2 years and he has been depressed for about a year already. I try to support him, but it doesn't seem to come though as support. He thinks I do not understand him, that I do not love him as I should, that I do not offer the support he needs. When I try to bring up my feelings he has told me that I am mean, that I am stupid, that I am boring and that I am just selfish. I am very confused.

I joined online-therapy because I am thinking that I have issues in the way I communicate, because whenever I try to offer some love and support I get anger and resentment back. huile de cbd

Lately things are pretty bad. He has pushed away all friendships. All he does is drink until he is drunk enough to fall asleep, smoke weed, order junkfood and play video games or scroll his phone. He refuses to clean the house or even tidy up after himself. He doesn't have a job, he is not trying to study, or really do anything in order to have a sustainable life.

I am the one paying for all the bills, even though I have a minimum wage job where I earn just enough to get by. I am the one cleaning, getting the house into a living space, cooking, doing grocery shopping, studying on the side, and basically the one keeping things a little together. And I honestly feel a little crazy. I wake up fearing what am I going to do wrong to make him upset. Sometimes me just looking at him can trigger some kind of fight. I am afraid of saying something that will make him more upset information for costus indien

He is been treating me with such unkindness, that I don't know if is the depression, is the alcohol or if he just hates me. plus d'informations sur la caroube

The therapist that is advising me doesn't want to focus on him so much, as she wants to focus on my own growth. And I get that, but I want to help him. And I feel clueless huile de cade . I ask him to please go to a therapist, but he doesn't think it will work. He would never take medications to get out of the depression.

All he cares about are video games, all day, all night. I don' t know how he can sustain himself if it wasn't for me. I would love to encourage him to try to study something, to volunteer, workout or do anything. But he won't listen. He thinks that there is nothing wrong to just behaving like a 13 year old.

I love him and I know if he would get some treatment life would be way more fulfilling. He is a talented person, he is very creative and super smart but nothing seems to excite him anymore.

How can I guide him to get help without being too pushy?

Whoever is reading this, thank you. I appreciate your time so much.

Good morning,

I saw your post while looking a little at the symptoms of depression, I had a few months ago at the loss of my husband, some of these symptoms. I also have a friend who experiences these worries and she has the price of food supplements of saffron and St. John's wort which has helped her a lot

good luck to you