The Cliche Of Not Being Good Enough pt 5 (triggering)

[ShyGirlHolly]

Junior High.
Those words bring venom into my mouth.
If there is a such thing as hell on earth I'm pretty sure it's Junior High.
It's pretty much where my depression\anxiety began.
Well, not in 7th grade. 7th grade was amazing for me. In fact, sometimes I'll think of happy I was and I'll start crying because I miss it so so so so much.
I had made three best friends. The first was a singer named Georgia. The second was a "new" girl like me named Alex. Lastly was a "new" guy named Johnny. We were four best friends - inseparable. We always sat at lunch together and laughed at each other in gym class. It was a wonderful friendship...one very new to me.
We had a lot in common. I never had friends that liked the same things as me.
But then Alex and Georgia started fighting - and I was caught between crossfire.
In the end, Georgia told me and Alex straight to our faces that we weren't good enough for her or her music career.
Then Johnny moved away to God knows where without telling us.

Alex and I were stayed best friends. But she isn't the same person.
I never tell her about my problems...and I don't trust her.
But at a sleepover she told me that she self-harms. And she drinks alcohol a lot. And lately she's been downing pain killers like crazy.
I think it's because she's been hanging out with some bad people.
I hang out with them, too.
But that's just because I have no one else.