Depression Understood Forums

Lots of times I feel sad and anxious. I don't know what it is. Maybe my brain structure has changed? I used to be so happy deep inside all of the time. Not anymore, even when something nice happens. As far as anxiety goes, perhaps it could be that I have accumulated so much in circumstances and information on how things go wrong with me and other people.

I'm 68, and when I was younger, I felt fearless. I took trips on my own and loved it. Now I have no interest in it. It's even gotten to the point that I don't like to take short trips, like going shopping. I hate myself for feeling that way. Maybe it's because I feel like it's just not safe out there.

I retired four years ago and it was not planned. It happened because things got really bad at my last job. I thought I'd go back out to work, but I enjoy not having to go to work. As far as finances go, there's less coming in than it used to be since I retired. I have tremendous anxiety when I drive because my car is old and it's broken down a few times. Perhaps getting a new one would make me happier but I don't want to shell out the money for it.

I'm content with my life. I live by myself and enjoy it. I work out and go bike riding every day. It makes me feel well for the time being.

I just don't know!

You having lived enough years with positive emotions is a wonderful sign that you can learn how to gain back more of them. One possibility for this painful psychological change of yours may be a subconscious accumulation of negative perspectives, associations and/or attitudes. Without being aware of it (even for the most mindful of us) these can 'build up' and painfully color our day-to-day experiences.

I do believe that when we age our minds change for the better or for the worse. Maybe try thinking of what (if any) significant changes that seemed to have become a dividing line for when these painful changes started. Try recognizing the psychological differences from the better days to the not so good days. Use those observations as clues as to what could be implemented now to ease your emotional pains.

I definitely recommend practicing a lot of mindfulness in order to figure out the most rooted problems that may be what metastasizes into the immediate pains. If there isn't much improvement in the problem-solving methods, I think the next best option would be to adopt/enhance optimistic, enthusiastic, playful attitudes. The positive perspectives won't get rid of the pains, but they can do a great job at distracting from the pains. Developing the habit of thinking optimistically is often greatly challenging, but when successful the hard work will be clearly seen as worthwhile.

I hope your travels are smoother than expected on the rough roads.

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