Depression Understood Forums

Ugh, I feel like i just need to get this off my chest, as it keeps just popping back up in my mind.

When I was 16 i had my first boyfriend( year older) he was a jerk. We dated for two years. I know he cheated on me but i stayed.
One night i was really drunk and couldnt stand. He wanted sex I said no and yet he decided it was a yes, the next morning i pretended like it never happened. Months past and we broke up ( i dodged a bullet though at the time i didnt think that, he left me for another girl) but circumstances had it that we ended up in the same room and again i told him not to touch me, he had sex with me well i laid there and cried. Again i pretended it didnt happen, however this time i cut him off. 2 years past and he tried to contact me... i wanted closure i asked him about it once and i asked why and his response was he was sorry an he didnt know why.

Its such a silly thing and I know it doesnt matter exspecially after sixr years but for some reason as of late its really been bugging me and making me upset. Idc if anyone even sees this.... i just needed a place to vent.

This is a perfect place to vent. I think it is completely acceptable for that to still bother you. I know how you feel about haunting exes and if you want to talk or vent to a specific person I am here, Iḿ sorry you're going through a tough time. Keep going. You'll find someone soon, and maybe soon it won't be as important or haunting to you. I know it still will always be there but I can promise you that it gets better.
-Inatura

As a man reading this, I can tell you that there is clearly more wrong with him than there is with you. It's very deeply built into the nature of men to protect women, it's hard-wired into our brains. For him to have treated you like this, and to see you crying while doing it suggests he's a very damaged person.
I hope you've learned to make better choices about the people you have in your life. The vast, overwhelming majority of men aren't like this and nobody should have to go through something like what you've experienced.
Good luck in your future!

purplejunkie wrote:Ugh, I feel like i just need to get this off my chest, as it keeps just popping back up in my mind.

When I was 16 i had my first boyfriend( year older) he was a jerk. We dated for two years. I know he cheated on me but i stayed.
One night i was really drunk and couldnt stand. He wanted sex I said no and yet he decided it was a yes, the next morning i pretended like it never happened. Months past and we broke up ( i dodged a bullet though at the time i didnt think that, he left me for another girl) but circumstances had it that we ended up in the same room and again i told him not to touch me, he had sex with me well i laid there and cried. Again i pretended it didnt happen, however this time i cut him off. 2 years past and he tried to contact me... i wanted closure i asked him about it once and i asked why and his response was he was sorry an he didnt know why.

Its such a silly thing and I know it doesnt matter exspecially after sixr years but for some reason as of late its really been bugging me and making me upset. Idc if anyone even sees this.... i just needed a place to vent.

You need to distance yourself from this guy. If it was rape then inform the police and talk to them about it. You need to give up drinking. If you were a victim, you really need to talk to someone near you about this.