a very hard day
Posted: Thu Apr 01, 2010 5:06 pm
Today was a very difficult day for me. It seemed like no matter where i went or what i did, the pain just would not go away....i kept seeing his truck everywhere....gosh, he drives like the most fregging common one there is...how many people could actually purchase the same one? uuugh! 
The radio was full of stupid breaking up or getting back together songs.... I could not get ANYONE on the darn phone!!! i was all alone today, i feel like a scared little girl, i have such a terrible headache, i tried to eat but i can't stop throwing up... the tears are refusing to come out... i am sure i would feel better if i could just cry some more...but my body has cut me off at the knees. I felt so numb i did not want to move, it's like everything took soooooooo much effort... I made myself get up and go outside, then i took all of mine and joe's pictures that i have left and i burned them, along with a few of the clothes he gave me. Why do i want them? i burned my letters to him that i had written this past week ...i was never going to send them to him anyway. i was just venting..... I felt better after burning the pictures, it was like an official goodbye from me! Sad but true.