Am I reacting in a "Normal" Way?

Feelings and emotions regarding depression, anxiety and other health issues.

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despinarri
Posts: 2
Joined: Fri May 22, 2020 5:42 pm

Am I reacting in a "Normal" Way?

Postby despinarri » Fri May 22, 2020 6:03 pm

I'm new to this forum, and in general to this website. And my main reason was for answers. I'm fairly young, and I haven't experienced much of life, or what is to be experienced; and yet I continue to feel this way.
I've felt this way since my youth, of course it wasn't bad, but my way of thinking was far from ideal. But I thought everyone felt the way I did it didn't hit me until I was in middle school, that I wasn't normal. There were occasions where I felt happiness, but no matter what I always felt sad, dreadful, or nervous.
I'm in my third year now of high school. And a lot has happened within these 3 years. But now I'm wondering if the way I feel is okay. I've never felt so low in my short life. I'm almost 17 and almost a senior. I feel as if once I'm an adult if I can handle being like this and alone.
Up until recently I've been more short-fused, sadder, more everything. I have friends and a bf who tell me that I'm going to be fine if tried to be, and it makes me sad to hear that.
I've been trying to stop feeling this way for years now. Yet it feels like no matter what I try or do nothing works.
I haven't gone to therapy or counseling, but I've been diagnosed with Depression. I've been trying to convince my parents to send me to see if I'm normal or at the very least see I'm alone or not.
I'm scared, I don't know if anyone will reply. All I want is to know that I'm fixable and that I can actually live to be old and achieve something. Last night I had the worse episode and I'm scared that I've hit the reaching point.
I don't know what to do anymore, I've tried to train myself to think more positively but the feeling of dread keeps overtaking everything, it's bad to the point where I start sputtering out non-sense and words. It's even resorted to me lashing out in intense situations, keep in mind this has never really happened to me. I feel angrier, and more violent but I've never had these anger issues before.

Sorry for rambling, but if anyone could answer me, I'd be so grateful. Thank you for taking the time to read.

angelo1936
Posts: 14
Joined: Wed Mar 25, 2020 8:26 pm

Re: Am I reacting in a "Normal" Way?

Postby angelo1936 » Sun May 24, 2020 7:55 pm

Hi destination,
I totally get what you're feeling tight now, I myself am at a similar age, and for years have wondered what's wrong me with, with others continually ignoring my cries of help. This can be extremely difficult for anyone, however, super hard to hear when it comes from friends or family. However, that is simply because they don't understand how you feel, in that way, depression is rather confusing, as it can cause sadness or overwhelming emotions fro reasons which others and often yourself won't understand, but I promise you, how you're feeling is okay, it's probably not that fun, but it's okay too feel angry or upset sometimes. Maybe try to explain to them more about how you feel, and try to open up when you need someone, and I know even this in itself can be really hard, because you feel vulnerable and you're mind will make you doubt yourself, your feelings and the people around you, but I promise you someone will be there for you, because they love you and they will support you no matter what. If you don't feel up to telling someone else, I definitely recommend this app called wysa. It's kinds like a therapist/friend to talk to. I do hope this message helps you and that you begin to accept your feelings.


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