Depression Understood Forums

I am still a student, in highschool. Just half a year ago, I moved from a place I grew up at to a place that's way across the world. At first, I missed my friends, but I decided to look forward to the new school and friends. When I started school, everyone was nice to me...maybe because I'm the new girl. I don't know...but maybe I'm too naive? I thought that by the way the act, I can trust them. I was happy...but after a month or so, they started acting strange. I ignored those signs and continued to follow them. Then during a school camp, I was following a friend around, but she walked really fast and made sharp turns and such. It was weird. When my other friend saw her and asked what she's doing, I saw her glance back at me and whispered, "Oh my god! She's so annoying! I hate her so much!" I was so hurt....I stopped following her and she ran off.

After that, one by one, the girls at school started hating me...I didnt do anything and I don't know why. I tried my best to be friends with them again, but it only made things worse. When I tried to talk about this to my friends back in my hometown, they weren't interested in what's happening to me. When I tried to talk to my parents, they didn't take it seriously and only thought that I was weak.

Then summer vacation came and ended. It was the first day of school and I dreaded it. I had hoped that the girls would stop hating me, but I soon found out that they're hating me even MORE now. So I tried to make friends with the new girl. We became friends quickly, and the girls at my school kept on gossiping about what a loner and loser I am. But I ignored them, because I had a friend.

One day after school, the girls were talking to my friend on a staircase. I was on the staircase right below them. I didnt know what they were talking about, but once I walked up, one girl shushed them and they all became flustered. Then my friend said, "Did she hear..? Oh, uh, today's hot huh?" She tried to cover it up...but I'm not an idiot. And exactly during that time, I had an anxiety attack, I can feel my heart beating so loud and fast. And I started breathing and sweating hard like I just ran.

It hurt so much...no one can help me...I tried to find people to help, since that advice was given, but it just doesn't work. No one takes me seriously. Also, I started losing sleep...I just can't seem to sleep at night and end up tossing, turning, stressing, and crying for a few hours. I just wish that I can sleep and never wake up sometimes.

I feel that I can't trust humans anymore...

summerhk,
i can feel your pain hun. i've been there went through that at school. sad part was i wasnt the "new girl" at all. sometimes people are mean for no reason, or because they are jealous of you. i konw this is easier said than done but try to ignore them move on and find new people to talk to, either older or younger. its hard to try and put yourself out there it really is so i understand how you'll feel with that. *hugs* i hope this was a bit helpful, please keep posting as time goes on!!!

The problem is the social group. These girls are not necessarily all bad people to start with, they are just part of their own little subculture that's making them mean because they've developed these social rules that guide them. They aren't really thinking individually, they depend on each other.

The solution would be to look for other, friendlier, kinder people. Unfortunately you are stuck there and your options may be limited at this point. But keep an eye out for nicer people who aren't part of a negative group. Too bad about that one friend, maybe she wanted to move into the "in crowd." But there will be others.

redux wrote:The problem is the social group. These girls are not necessarily all bad people to start with, they are just part of their own little subculture that's making them mean because they've developed these social rules that guide them. They aren't really thinking individually, they depend on each other.

The solution would be to look for other, friendlier, kinder people. Unfortunately you are stuck there and your options may be limited at this point. But keep an eye out for nicer people who aren't part of a negative group. Too bad about that one friend, maybe she wanted to move into the "in crowd." But there will be others.

the thing is dat my skl is small...only like...around 16 girls in the grade excluding me. out of the 16, 10 r the "popular" n "in" group, 2 r new students, n the other 4 r sumthing like misfits. i tried hanging out wif the "misfits" but it didnt work...i cant go along wif them at all since we're not exactly the same type of ppl...not dat im discriminating them, they're rly nice ppl, but im just different from them.

as u c, 16 girls...so its either the popular or misfits. the misfits...i cant seem to blend in no matter how hard i try, n the popular ones r just....hating me for no reason...

georgiapeach wrote:summerhk,
i can feel your pain hun. i've been there went through that at school. sad part was i wasnt the "new girl" at all. sometimes people are mean for no reason, or because they are jealous of you. i konw this is easier said than done but try to ignore them move on and find new people to talk to, either older or younger. its hard to try and put yourself out there it really is so i understand how you'll feel with that. *hugs* i hope this was a bit helpful, please keep posting as time goes on!!!

its hard to ignore them...since i go to skl n hv almost every single class wif them. i cant find new ppl since the new ppl r always being drawn in by them. i wanna change skls...but i can only go to international skls since local skls r too hard for me...n not a lot of international skls r gud here

Just 16 in your class...that's tough, I see the problem. Don't give up on the school group, but at the same time you could learn a little more Chinese (I assume hk is for Hong Kong?) and try to make a friend or two outside of school. Hopefully someone your age around your neighborhood to be real close friends. People will want to practice their English. But even if you have a friendly shopkeeper or beauty parlor operator around, something like that, at least it's nice to have a "hello, how are you today" to brighten things up. Every place has kind people lurking around somewhere if you are lucky enough to get to know them.