Depression Understood Forums

It makes me uncomfortable to spend time around my family at my sister's house on Thanksgiving, Christmas and Neice and Nephews birthday's. I suffer from major depression, anxiety, panic, social anxiety and agoraphobia. Last year I avoided Thanksgiving because I just couldn't deal with it emotionally. I did attend Christmas last year and both kids birthdays this year. This year I am considering avoiding Thanksgiving again because I just don't feel like dealing with it emotionally. These gatherings make me uncomfortable because of my mental illness, because I feel like I'm on display and because I feel like I'm being judged as to whether my condition justifies me being on disability insurance. Part of me feels like I should go to as many of these functions as I can since I don't know how much longer my 87 year old grandparents and 67 and 69 year old parents are going to be alive. It's a real struggle since my conditions worsened about a year ago. Thanksgiving seems the most difficult because we are all sitting around a table and I feel more self conscious about everything. Does anyone else struggle with situations like these?

Yeah... I tend not to go to parties. When I do, I sit around for a little bit & then I find a spot where I can go & just cool out by myself. If anyone asks, "Why are you here by yourself?" I tell them that I like it there & talk about how the energy of spot feels nice. Often times, people leave me alone after I say something like that.

Them: Why such & such?
Me: It's not my cup of tea.

& there are no apologies about it.

For Thanksgiving, we are not a sit around the table type much. We can all sit where we want. It's no big deal. For the events I've gone to, there were usually enough people around that every last one of us COULD NOT fit at the table.

What you could always do is take just a little bit of food, so that you finish before everybody else & then you excuse yourself. After it dies down, you can go back, take what you want, & it should be less crowded.

Most times, I sit & listen to whatever & then chime in every once in a while.

A lot of times the party doesn't have people my age, so what it is more than okay for me to go in a corner some place & be unto myself, or even leave.[/i]