So I went to be a camp counselor last week at a Leadership Development and Social Justice Education camp, which also features a healthy dose of mental health development and awareness. Fairly ironic, I know, but regardless, there I go!
It let me get a few of my issues out in the open at least. I came back and talked with my dad about him hitting me. I told him he shouldn't have and let him know just how much it damaged me. I didn't let him blame me, or avoid responsibility, and we both managed to accept what happened and basically, he agreed to let me get away from school for a semester and figure out what I want to do and save some money, etc. Basically allow myself to have a little more control over my life.
My crush has been... well that's been crushing me, appropriately enough. It's painful, but for now I have to accept her friendship and be patient for a better time. We'll have our chance to see if there's anything to this at some point, but until then I have to try and let go. Easier said, but whatever!
Learning to play the keyboard. Been at it for a month, and I think I'm coming along fairly well. I know a few songs, like Hall of the Mountain King and Greensleeves, even if I'm not perfect with them yet. Decided to tackle Moonlight Sonata since it seems challenging but not impossible at this stage. There is something so amazing about playing music. I wished I'd started when I was younger.
I guess I'll be resigning from Student Government this friday. I love being the VP, but I can't hold on to the position if I'm not taking classes. It's sad, but I'm not that sad. I mean, I'll still be around to help out, and give my two cents.
Looking for work has proven to be predictably challenging, even with my AA. Took a career interests test to see what I might enjoy doing. I seem to enjoy education, writing and interacting with people. I thought about being a teacher years ago, but my folks dismissed it because there wasn't much money in it. I'm starting to reevaluate that idea.
Right now, moving forward is difficult, but from what I can gather, things aren't that bad. Things are fluid right now, nothing's really stable... but things will stabilize and I've got a good footing. I wish I could feel this... sane all the time, but whatever. I've got a lot of challenges, but there's nothing wrong with that. I can handle this
