my friends say forget about it and be happy but I can't

[leahpopcorn]

When I told my friends that I had depression they just laughed and said that I didn't and I was being silly. They don't understand what my life is like and when they say that it makes me feel abandoned in a way. It makes me feel that they don't care about me and the way that I feel. I'm starting to wander if I actually have any friends. Also, when they say things, they hurt my feelings and it makes me feel even worse. It makes me want to self harm again and, for some reason, whenever I tell them that they always say that they are there to help me but the only thing they help me with is feeling even worse. I just want it to end. I want proper help. Please

[Ieris]

Hi Leah,

I'm sorry to hear that your friends have treated you that way. It will be hard to explain something to them which they don't understand, try not to take it to heart. Just enjoy their company and do what you usually do with them but find other people to talk to about your deeper issues. Not everyone will be a good listener or be able to give you good advice so be selective. Use this forum as an outlet, I believe people here will understand how you feel and pass no judgement.

Try to separate your friends from your depression, when you mix them together it can put a strain on your friendship especially if they don't know how to deal with it. I don't want them to abandon you or the other way around, making you feel all alone which only makes your depression worse.

Do you know how your depression came about? Have you considered seeing a doctor/therapist? x

[leahpopcorn]

Hi Ieris (I'm guessing that's your name)
Thank you for the advice and I'll try to be normal with my friends it's just hard when you feel sad most of the time.
I'm not how my depression came about and the annoying thing is, I don't know how to get rid of it. I have thought about going to see a doctor but I don't like talking to people face to face so I decided to come on this and, so far, the advice has been good.

[SMichelleA]

Believe it or not, your friends telling you that you're being silly is probably the only way that they can think to make your problems vanish. Obviously, this won't work...but if they don't get it, they don't get it. They want the problem gone as much as you do. Sounds like they're fluffing it off, but I bet really care about you - they just don't know what to say.

I agree - let you friends be your friends and your therapist be your therapist. If you don't have one (like me) then come on here. Read a self help book. Do what you can to seek help. I have found that of all of my friends, I have only one to two friends that I can discuss my depression with. Even then, it has strained our relationship from time to time and that's when I bring out my inner child and just act silly with them and shove it under the rug. It's what they're there for. Besides, we all need a break from trying to deal sometimes. Allow yourself to have fun with your friends - your depression will forgive you later