I am A Slow Learner

[noodlesoup6]

Dear,,

Hi.. please introduce myself,,I am Asian,24 years old. I am unemployed. I have been fired from the job I was in twice. I can hardly find any other job bcs of my bad working experience on my cv.
Since then, I realized that I am a slow learner. I was fired bcs I did mistakes for so many times and didn't understand the instructions properly.

Well, I have big problem with learning new thing. I used to be a very hardworker but still there always be some flaws on my work. My supervisor always mad at me like, "I've said it so many times!". They did right thing. I didnt blame my previous supervisors who fired me. All I am blaming is my ability of learning and understanding.

Because of this,I know my weakness well. This leads me to have a terrible feeling when it comes to talk to someone, I'm always getting nervous and panic when I have to explain something. That's one of the reason why I got fired. I have bad communication skill. Why, because I am afraid if I'm doing wrong.

Ever since the last day of my working, I haven't applied for any job yet. I have traumatic feeling about getting fired. My mom always scold me and asking why I'm not looking for another Job. In fact, I never told this to anyone before include, (especially) my parents. I told them that my contract was terminated because I had to handle another job outside my Job desc. I didn't tell them the honest reason.

I can't even share this to my bestfriends bcs they are the people I am envy with. They are the people I wish I could be. They are now having good position in their company with good salary. I feel so much intimidated when we go out for cinema or just hanging out,, they're all proudly spending their self-earn money and sharing their working experience. Meanwhile, I am still using my parent's money,, and the leftover money from my last salary.Things are getting harder for me when they ask what my daily activities are. In fact Im just doing nothing at home.

I keep telling lies to everyone. I am really afraid to tell the truth and to be judged. Having myself as a slow learner has already become the most hurtful thing I have to face.

Now I am fighting so much againts my own anxiety and low self esteem. I am so afraid what if I never get a proper job.
I am really expecting for you to do me a favor about what to do? What am I supposed to do ?
I am so much thankful for your help..

Best Regards
@noodlesoup6

[delsina363]

Hi noodlesoup6:

It seems everytime I read messages in this forum, I always can somehow relate, and it makes me feel better that I am not the only one going through this. You should not be so hard on yourself. You seem to know what the problem is and that is a good first step. When I was young and had my breakdown, I thought I could never work again. But I took it one day at a time. I had no choice, my Mom was going to kick me out (again). Just take it one day at a time, maybe start out with a part-time position for now. I am really bad at communicating things in work, I held a supervisory position once, and that was a total disaster. I now have a job where I am pretty much left alone to do my own work, and I like it. As far as forgetting things, try writing everything down, that is what I do. I am ALWAYS writing down things, on a note pad, or a sticky note, etc. Then when I have a bunch of notes, I enter them into the computer so if I forget something, I can go back and look at my notes. You may also want to confide in your doctor that you are experiencing panic and anxiety. There is medication for this. Good Luck my friend.

[Glad2bme]

I went to one at my church when I was unemployed for a long time when the economy was a wreck. I was out of work over a year and my resume had good stuff on it, but got no love at all.

I've battled depression since I was young and losing a job really hurts. I have a lot of my self esteem tied up in being a good worker. I have to take medication to maintain a level of concentration that makes my work acceptable. It also makes my life more manageable so I do it.

The job club helped me feel better about me, set goals and get on track. I also worked with the unemployment office and got on several temp agency's lists. I only worked for one at a time, but after I got a full time job that I wanted all my activity searching finally was still getting me lots of calls. It was almost embarrassing telling people everyday that I appreciated their interest, but I was happy where I was. (Fast forward to today. Too bad I deleted all those numbers. LOL)

It's kind of about momentum. Every day for weeks applying to multiple places and making follow up calls. Delivering actual paper resumes to some places. (Most won't take them in my field.)

After a job loss it's easy to want to crawl into a hole in the earth and pull a patch of grass over you, but stuff happens. Don't give into that. Fight it. Depending on your insurance you might be able to talk to a counselor and find some apptitude testing. Maybe you are taking jobs you hate.

If you can find something that you can love doing it's easier to learn. What do you really like in life? Find something that inspires you and makes you feel like you want to learn more about it. Then take some training class or volunteer somewhere to get skills in that area. That can put you are ahead of the curve on something your friends aren't.

Some people get their resume done professionally. It is the foot in the door. Often it's about key industry words. You sound young enough that an extensive resume isn't expected.