My boyfriend recently came out of the "closet"
His friends decided to seclude him, his mom chose to ignore him and his provincial soccer team coach. is now sitting him for the whole provincials;games,trainings.
He doesn't want to talk to anyone/Want any help. last i've heard from his mom, he was in the hospital recovering from an Overdose.
how should I approach and help him!?
Help. In need of advice.
Moderators: windsong, BlueGobi, Moderators, Astrid
My approach to helping anyone heal, anyone in hospital at all, is to be present, to be there.
My experience is that this is what is most needed and ultimately what is most appreciated. If there is something I can bring which I know would cheer the person up, that's good, but it is yourself which is most helpful.
People who are ill are almost universally in a lonely place. I always bring some thing to read or work to do so I can spend as much time as possible without having to engage. The person may not want or be able to speak, but two sentences in three hours will have a very positive effect if your there to hear or say them. Even if your waiting outside and they know it, then they know you value them.
This gets harder for me when a convalescent goes home, but the principal still applies. Be there as a mirror, as a voice, as a human who values this person. Generally, when a person shows they don't want anyone, what they are rejecting is the heavy load of judgement; the judgement comes from within and without. So the trick to be present and be neutral.
Good Luck
My experience is that this is what is most needed and ultimately what is most appreciated. If there is something I can bring which I know would cheer the person up, that's good, but it is yourself which is most helpful.
People who are ill are almost universally in a lonely place. I always bring some thing to read or work to do so I can spend as much time as possible without having to engage. The person may not want or be able to speak, but two sentences in three hours will have a very positive effect if your there to hear or say them. Even if your waiting outside and they know it, then they know you value them.
This gets harder for me when a convalescent goes home, but the principal still applies. Be there as a mirror, as a voice, as a human who values this person. Generally, when a person shows they don't want anyone, what they are rejecting is the heavy load of judgement; the judgement comes from within and without. So the trick to be present and be neutral.
Good Luck
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