my depressive boyfriend refuses professional help what now?

Depression/anxiety may have touched your family, your friends, yourself; what helps you to deal with it? Sharing is caring!

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babes
Posts: 1
Joined: Sat May 18, 2013 1:31 pm

my depressive boyfriend refuses professional help what now?

Postby babes » Sat May 18, 2013 5:18 pm

Hello,
I am posting this because I need advice. My boyfriend has depressions, he told me that before we dated, but I actually did not really realise what that means.
He is getting periods where he is very honest , when he can't hold up the wall around him anymore. He told me for example that he never wanted to kill himself until now but that he most of the time feels like it wouldn't matter to him because his life doesn't mean anything to him. He feels like the world is a disgusting place and that he will never really be happy in his life. He just wishes either all the people on the world would vanish and didn't exist or he simply didn't exist. He told me that at first he didn't want a relationship with me because he thinks he will make me unhappy one day because he is 99 percent sure that he one day will end his life, he thinks it will be before he is fourty, we both are 22. However, we talk a lot with each other and I know I am the only person he trusts and he tells me everything, for other people he always pretends to be fine it is like two different persons. He still is very affectionate and tells me he loves me and we share intimacy. I love him to bits, but I can't really understand his way of seeing things because I am a very happy and positive person, when I wake up I am happy to be here. I just don't understand why he feels so negative about it. I know it is a disease but I would just like to understand why and he doesn't lnow it himself. He says it has always been like that. The only thing he says that ever made him happy and hope that life could actually be nice is me because I make him feel.
I love him and we have been together for a while now, I want to help him but I don't know how.
When he was younger his mother send him to a doctor and he made him take pills. We talked about that, he said he felt good, he was happy but it wasn't him anymore. He says he somehow likes to feel like that (depressed). I don't want him to take pills, I want him to talk to someone professional who can figure out why it is like that. Anyways, he refuses to talk to a psycologist and he is really stuborn with it. I doubt he will ever do it.
So what can I do, I need help...
I hope someone can give me advice,
thank you

fallen
Posts: 264
Joined: Sat Mar 16, 2013 1:04 am

Postby fallen » Sat May 18, 2013 9:59 pm

the fact he has some one like you in his life is a beautiful thing, to be loved is one of the most precious gifts that life can bestow upon us.
lots of things make people generally depressed.
a lack of sun and there fore a lack of vitamin d can make people sad.
taking to much sugar in foods and drinks[soft drinks] puts the mind and body on massive highs and lows.watch your boyfriend as his mood changes after consuming one of those items.
vitamins prescribed by a qualified naturopath can improve moods and mood swings, e.g. vitamins B's,C, etc.
i go to a hypnotherapist witch helps alot,it does not cost much and has helped many i know with lots of different things, smoking etc.
if he loves you he has a responsibility to you and himself.
take care of yourself.

dougsan
Posts: 104
Joined: Thu Apr 11, 2013 1:59 pm
Location: Massachusetts

Postby dougsan » Mon May 20, 2013 6:10 pm

He owes it to his loved ones to try and beat his depression. You can tell him that until you're blue in the face. If he's me he'll ignore you or curse your intelligence. If he curses this is good because it means he really cares about you.

What would I do in your place? I tell my friends, when I start the quick slide into my depression, not to come around but contact me every day telling me they love me and they can't be around me when my depression gets bad because of the way I act towards them. The communications, limited to once a day because I get very short tempered, bring me back as I reach for their love, which I know I need.


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