Depression Understood Forums

Hi all. I think I've always had a history of minor depression, but somethings happened in the last 3-4 weeks. My sleep pattern has fell all over the place, and my feelings of "depression" have never been this intense. I visited my doc a week and a half ago and the verdict was minor depression, and anxiety for which I've been perscribed Citalopram. (A new one on me, before I'd had "Amoxolin"(?) but never persisted with it.) I used to be a long term heavy cannabis smoker (20 years or so) but I've quit that 17 weeks ago. I'm worried that that has left me with psychological problems as well. I have an appointment with a WellBeing councillor on Monday, my first positive step to helping myself. I'm useless at staying proactive and getting out there and seeing and meeting people, so a forum of similar minds seems a first good step.

Hi Jay-O, welcome to the family

I personally have not had the experience of of cannabis so don't know what to say about that. But seeing a doctor is definitely a good thing. Often that is the hardest step to take so I applaud your action!

Keep your upcoming appt, and visit here as you feel comfortable. You will find many wonderful and brave people who have found the strength to look outside of their depression to help others.

Looking forward to hearing more from you

Daffodilly

Hello Jay-o. I look forward to getting to know you.

Sending warm wishes.

Thanks for the warm welcome. It's just turning 7 am here and now is when I'm at my worst. As well as the Citalopram the doc gave me I went back a few days after and begged for something to help me sleep. I live on my own and it's in the middle of the night that the lonelines and anxiety really take a hold. The doc eventually agreed to give me 14 10mg Tamazepam tablets, but I'm only allowed to take 1 every 3 or 4 nights. I'd mentioned this to a couple of people and they said the tamazepam would knock me right out, I had my first one on Saturday and woke up 2 and a 1/4 hours later, just how I always seem to now. :( I had my second one last night, and was awake an hour and a half later. :(
I shouldn't complain because the 5-5 1/2 hours sleep I'm getting now is a lot better that the 3-4 hours I was getting in the previous weeks, but it's still unbelieveably distressing. I'm used to having at least 7-8 hours ,I don't understand what has happened to me to bring all this on. If I was just waking up, that would be hard enough but the feelings of dread, fear, anxiety that accompany it are the worst. And I have no idea what i'm anxious about. :(
I've had my sons staying with me this week, we were away Sunday and Monday, and we're going away again today through to Monday. They are the only sunshhine in my life at the minute. They're old enough to know somethings wrong but I'm trying my hardest not to let it get in the way of my week with them. But the undercurrent of having to take them back to their mum on Monday is there as well. I will try to get online while I'm away, but if not, I will be back Monday. I fear I'm going to be REALLY low then, once I've dropped my kids back. :(

I understand about the lack of sleep and how it makes you feel. I get about 3-4 hours of sleep a day. Been that way since hubby passed. And yes, the nights are the worst for lonliness. One thing that helps a lot for me is to hang out in the chat room here. Might wanna give it a try hon.

Hi Obayan, thanks for the kind words. I discovered the chatroom yesterday thanks, and yep, seems like a good place to be for support, with a group of similar minded people. Hopefully my loneliness won't be so lonely anymore. :)