Hello everyone

[moonbow23]

Um...well I'm not quite sure
I just started high school this year and I am pretty much a normal kid. I used pretty good friends and a nice family, good grades and a good life. I'm not going to say that I have it bad or anything that would be a lie. For some reason though latley I have been having some serious problems with depression. My group of friends is having a civil war and I don't want to choose between them. My father left my mother when I was at the sleepover where my friends split and though he's back now nothing is the same. Somthing is broken I am broken. It has been a while since then and I am still having problems. I can't be happy anymore nothing helps. My father says that crying and being sad is a weakness. I can't talk to anyone, but I am so troubled. So I joined here hoping that it would help me. I am so afraid.

[dazed&confused]

welcome aboard, moonbow ... i am rather new here myself so i do not have very many words to comfort you right now ... except for this one fact ... if you *feel* like crying ... then please ... cry sweet soul, for the more you keep that pain locked away inside of you ... truuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust me ... it's only going to get worse. showing emotions is something we, as the complicated creatures we are as humans, *need* to be able to do. the weakness, in my opinion, really comes from the one who shows no emotion at all we all have hearts and they are fragile components, take care of yours kind soul ... please? it sounds as if you have agood one

also remember, you are extremely young ... fights between friends will come and go, but if the relationship is worth half a d*m* ... you can rest assured that those same friends wil be there for you 20 years down the line ... wanting to and sometimes insisting on helping you any way they can ... i only know this because my girls from high school just proved it to me as recent as tonight.

it will get better for you my dear ... please know that, you still have alot of growing to do ... and between now and then come on back here and add to your story as you see fit ... know you are not alone; if i've learned anything the very short time i've been here ... i know there is always, always going to be some one to speak up with exactly what you need to hear to "make it right" ... until then, i hope you are doing ok and li look forward to hearing more from you!

[moonbow23]

Thank You
Last night I was just so confused and I am glad I found this place even though I know my problems are minor it still helps to be here. I have one statement that I guess I was too afraid to put in my introduction, but now I think I need to say it. When I was little I had problems when people were mad at me. Whenever they seemed angry even if they weren't I would bite myself until I was bruised or bleeding. As I got older I stopped this, but now even though I know my problems are stupid and will pass I get into a sort a place where... I don't know what to call it where I am so angry at myself that I just do it again. I am afraid to show my mother or father because if I do they may get all mad again. I'm too embarressed to tell my friends who think the kids that cut themselves for fun are stupid. I'm not doing it for attention, I hate myself and I can't stop. I know that there are people out there with worse problems and I sound like a stupid horomonal teenager. I just feel like I have to write this down or I'll explode.

[xn728]

hi moonbow23 dont feel alone ,my dear freind ,your young and and obviusly aware of how your feelings are for you ,,its confusing i know and
is upsetting for you ,,i dont have all the answers but all i know is that you found your way here and soon you will feel the warmth and kindness of
this wonderful forum around you ,,we try and support each other here and if you read some of the posts in here you may understand a little better ,,if you feel like shareing more of your self with us then just let it
out when ever your ready ,if you just want to say hello now and then ,thats just fine ,,i hope you find what your looking for here ,if you should stumble on this road we share ,i/we will reach out and catch your fall ,,,,,take care my daer freind welcome home ,,,,hugs xn728

[dazed&confused]

(((((((((moonbow))))))))) i am soooooooooooooooo sorry if i gave the impression that your problems are anything less than serious!! for they are my sweet child!! please, come here and feel safe ... we will never harm nor judge you. it is not stupid, it is not any less important than anyone else's problems either ... it is very real and extremely important ... if nothing else, please believe that?

[moonbow23]

dazed and confused
Oh god no
I did not mean for my addition to make you feel bad
It was somthing that someone else in my everyday life said to me
Reading eveyone's stories here helped me and I now think that I should try and talk with my teachers. I need to get my life back on track and forget this. I believe that I am going to give my father another chance. Up until now I have been too afraid to talk and thought I was weak. Now putting part of my story out there and seeing others do the same has inspired me. Bless you all and thank you for reading and supporting me.

Here is somthing that has also helped me
While hiding in my attic I found a book of poems that my grandma had written. They are very beautiful and inspiring. She is not the best poet, but they are all about hope and optimisim. They reminded me that there is still a long road ahead of me. This quote of hers really helped me and I guess I hope it helps someone else too though it is not shakespeare it says somthing that I guess I should have known all along.

"Life is like a prisim, it takes sunshine to make a rainbow."