My depression keeps on returning

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Thegerbil
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2021 2:17 pm

My depression keeps on returning

Postby Thegerbil » Wed Mar 10, 2021 3:25 pm

It always feels like I'm on a roller coaster. I have my mental ups and downs. Sometimes, I am completely fine and suddenly, I am a depressed and anxious mess. I can't take it. I recently had a breakdown and my parents finally responded to my needs, they said they would help me and that things would get better. They didn't, they still treat me as if i were fine. Iunderstand why, I don't act sick, but they're my parents! Shouldn't they know me better than that? Sometimes, I feel like i am always repeating the same cycle, but in every rendition, my bad habits get worse and worse. I am scared that I will hurt myself more and more as time goes on. I really don't have a solution. Apparently even therapy would place me on a six month waiting list first. Great

CamGirl
Posts: 114
Joined: Mon Dec 04, 2017 2:04 am

Re: My depression keeps on returning

Postby CamGirl » Wed Mar 17, 2021 6:49 am

That waiting part is really a bummer. It's hard to deal with this especially when nobody knows exactly what's happening. I hope you get the help you need soon. It's the best way to manage your depression from what you said.

Brennen_Green20
Posts: 12
Joined: Fri Mar 05, 2021 4:51 pm

Re: My depression keeps on returning

Postby Brennen_Green20 » Fri Mar 19, 2021 1:02 pm

I have come to the conclusion that we should stop blaming our parents for their shortcomings and try to help ourselves. Parents are humans too and didn't read a manual on how to be parents. They could have their reasons and fears in neglecting you. or maybe they just plain forgot. I mean they are humans too. I'm not trying to sound like I'm judging you or anything. You could be way younger than me, this is also a pep talk I'm tryna give myself. I Blame my parents for so many things and I wish I didn't. I wish I could cut them some slack.

As far as your mental health is concerned, I am happy that your parents at least listened once. Some people don't even have that luxury. Hope you get into therapy soon. If this year has taught us anything is that we do not have time, as we think we might. Just smile and live a little every day. Best of luck to you man :)

Carol7215
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Mar 24, 2021 3:41 am

Re: My depression keeps on returning

Postby Carol7215 » Wed Mar 24, 2021 4:03 am

I have come to the conclusion that the roller coaster is here to stay for me. I used to think I could take an herbal supplement and exercise and eat well instead of taking medication. That didn't work. Then, I gave up and started to take anti-depressants but when I felt a little better - I figured my depression was gone so stopped taking them. That didn't work. Then, I gave up and started taking medication religiously. I figured that would fix it. It must help somewhat because I'm not ALWAYS down a very dark hole. But I still get knocked off my horse --- I have accepted that's the way it is. Now I just want to learn a way to not go so far down the hole when it happens. I sleep, cry, zombie out on tv, and feel guilty because I'm not answering the phone or returning texts or checking the mail or pretty much anything. The other thing I've got to deal with is the fact that friends take it personally so don't have any of them left. And family gives me hell for being selfish when I finally crawl out of the hole. I should have responded to their texts with "I don't want to talk now" or something like that. What don't they get about an immobilizing depressive state? Or I get the "Well, I guess I'm just learning to live with it" as if it's their cross to bear. Ok I'm done ranting ... it's 4am and now I can't sleep. I'm not sure if any of that relates but when I read "roller coaster" I thought - yup, that's me.

koala
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed Mar 24, 2021 3:47 am

Re: My depression keeps on returning

Postby koala » Wed Mar 24, 2021 4:57 am

heyy. i do relate with your situation. sometimes i can be so happy and grateful, and i can also be very sad, anxious, and wanted to kill myself. it was very hard, don't it? and i survived without my parents knowing what I've been through. well i can't expect anything from them, they're asian and they would say that there's no such a thing. but i know you could survive without your parents help, I didn't mean that you should survive alone. but if your parents didn't do anything and you're sad and like clueless, you have to rely on yourself cause that's what you have. oh wait im being useless here hahaha im sorry if my explanation are bit boring and didn't help at all. im kinda suck at talking and showing what i feel. but one thing for sho, I hope you feel better and your parents will help you asap. but don't get your expectations too high, you have to keep fighting for yourself. love you, cheer up !!

Thegerbil
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2021 2:17 pm

Re: My depression keeps on returning

Postby Thegerbil » Thu Apr 08, 2021 4:22 pm

@koala, yeah, I guess so. What really bothers me is the fact that my parents put a lot of Emphasis on family and it bothers me that they can't help me in this aspect, considering how much they care for the rest of my family and their friends. Maybe it's also my fault, because I don't talk about it enough with my family and I don't want to seem weak to them. Then again, when they do know, they won't adress it. It's really weird, i guess

dq333
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Apr 12, 2021 2:33 pm

Re: My depression keeps on returning

Postby dq333 » Mon Apr 12, 2021 3:29 pm

I am suffering the same.

ScorpioMadness007
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Apr 15, 2021 8:26 pm
Location: New York

Re: My depression keeps on returning

Postby ScorpioMadness007 » Thu Apr 15, 2021 8:29 pm

I can relate and I feel your pain. Dealing with some of the same things now. Continually going down the black hole of depression and it feels like no one in my family cares- and if they do they don’t show it- or they if so care they don’t care enough to help. It’s been a downward spiral since I was about 11 and I’m 32 now... it never seems to end.


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