Depression Understood Forums

For the longest time I've been afraid to reach to anyone how I've been feeling. I'm at a point in my life where I just want to start everything over even though I'm only 21. Sometimes I think about dying but I'm too scared to even attempt to take my own life. I often get caught up in the idea of just restarting my life and leaving everything behind. Even just typing this out and letting out this pent up energy is helping. I hate myself and what I am now. I feel that at every turn I'm failing. I'm trying to pull through university but even this seems pointless. All the dreams and goals I had for myself are too far gone and nothing seems worth it anymore. Sometimes I wonder if I do this to myself and that I should just do better for myself, but it just seems hard when I'm so detached from everything I'm supposed to be doing.

I'm happy that I was able to find this place though and after reading what other people have said I decided to make an account and reach out. I wish everyone here the best and its good to know I'm not alone.

hii

i can't fully say that i know how you feel because i don't , but i can say that i relate to you . I started univeristy and i don't like what i'm doing , so what if you are 21 ? To be honest i never really cared about my future , but we are supposed to choose at some point right? Whatever i'm doing here feel pointless but i just keep going . I would like to say to myself "drop everything and go find who you are and what inspire you" but it will cost a lot . I may don't know you but i want you to be happy , to feel fulfilled and if you feel like starting everything over, who'll stop you if this is really want you want deep down , the question is if you or i are ready to take the step ? Even if it's scary or you still don't know.

Hoping for more good days to you , also welcome !