New member - just saying hi and venting a little.

[YMHJeans]

Hi Everyone,

I don't know how frequently I will use this site, or if I will again to be perfectly honest. But I just wanted to vent a little bit, and put some of myself out there.

I don't know why I thought getting on this forum was a good idea. It just made sense. I guess it is because the last few days have been challenging and scary. I've started to feel things I have not felt in a while. I've started to have intrusive thoughts, I feel nervous for no defined reason, I just have a general feeling of fear all of the time. I am hoping this is a phase, I have had these before. I'm all most positive that is a phase that I will come out of soon, but all most is not good enough, all most still leaves room for doubt and that doubt is a scary thing. What is even more scary is the possibility of going back to where I once was. I live with that fear everyday and most days I can dismiss that fear, however others I can't.

On those days I can't I become terrified of what my life will be, who I will be, who my family will see me as.

Today is one of those days, I try to smile as I pass my family on the stairs and hope it's enough to get them to not ask any questions, get to my room, and wait this thing out.

I don't know if this is a phase or not, I hope it is, but if not I am prepared to seek the help I need, again.

I guess the last thing I want to say is that if anyone has any advice they can offer me, or anything they can share with me then please do, becuase as of right now this is the only open window I have.

[JonsDragonEyes]

Hi there YMHJeans. I can understand why you found this site. Your lost and you don't know where or who to turn to.

My name is Star and it's nice to meet you. I'm sorry your going through a rough time. Are you doing any better ? You said that you might not come back here but I hope you do. Nobody should have to face their struggles all alone.

I hope your feeling better by now but if your not let us know how your doing okay,

love and hugs always