Evenin' all

[hectorgrey]

Hi there. My name is Chris, and I'm depressed. I've been asked how long I've been depressed for, and I honestly can't answer - all I know is, it's so long that I've forgotten what being happy actually feels like.

I've not had the best life, though it'd be selfish to assume that I've had the worst. I don't really know how to describe what led up to this point; on the one hand, I feel like describing my life so far would probably explain it pretty well, but on the other, this isn't something that I feel should be in my first introductory post - not out of lack of trust, but because this is liable to bring back really bad memories for some people here (so trigger warnings from here on in regarding various types of abuse), which would be unfair to anybody who just happened to stumble on this introductory post.

The cliff notes involve me being a twenty seven year old man who's just now gone back to university as a freshman, who has had two serious relationships that have both gone down the pan (the latter largely as a result of this depression), whose main male role model (my grandfather) is suffering from vascular dementia and likely won't remember me when I go home and who grew up in an abusive household.

I honestly can't give real details right now - given the mood I'm currently in, I can't promise to avoid strong language and I'd rather avoid getting into trouble with my very first post. So please just allow me to say hello, it's nice to meet you all, and you all have my best wishes for the future.

[Ieris]

Hello Chris,

Thanks for being so considerate towards the others. We are all here to spill our thoughts so feel free to share your thoughts and feelings, hopefully someone here will be able to help.

I think it is great that you have gone back to University, are you enjoying your course? I am sorry to hear about your grandfather, although it is sad that he may not remember you try not to focus on the negative, do cherish and appreciate the times that you have had and can still have together.

I hope you come back and write more when you are feeling better.

x