Hello everyone.
I am 20 going 21 this year. I've been battling with myself whether I suffered from depression or not for a very long time. I used to think that I didn't have depression, I just feel sad more often than others.
It was just last year when I realised, my sadness is getting more critical. I get upset easily, I cry easily, I am moody all the time and I can't make any friends. I lose interest in things that I used to like and I am tired all the time. I attribute my tiredness to juggling school and work but it's actually an excuse. Due to this tiredness, I skipped school. End up, I quit school.
This action of leaving school impacted me the most. Since I only worked weekends, my weekdays were all empty. My small circle of friends either are studying or working so I was alone most of the time. When I logged on to social websites (facebook), all I see are pictures of my friends/classmates happy faces. It just makes me feel so lousy about myself. They have a life and what am I doing here?? Why did I give up school?? Why did I submit to lethargy and skip school? Why didn't I put in more efforts in making friends??
I blamed myself for this outcome. If I weren't so weak, I wouldn't end up like this. If only I have the strength & courage to persevere.
I tried schooling, again, by enrolling into a private school. I attended the 1st day of school and I couldn't even make it for the rest of the week because I felt so "tired". I decide to quit this school too, partly because there was problems with my bank loan application, but mainly because it was apparent I just didn't have the "heart" to study.
This just can't go on anymore... I don't know what to do... It had became clear I'm suffering from depression. So I'm just gonna accept this fact and try to work my life out.
Thank you for hearing me out.
Introduction
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suncatcher
- Posts: 7
- Joined: Mon Jan 24, 2011 9:20 pm
- Location: oklahoma
hello dear
lifes journey seems sometimes to be so difficult, and as much as one hears depression commercials on tv...they have some truth to their information, however, like any other television moment...its not your life they are airing.
deep breathing , well .., i have to work at that myself, but you can breathe the tension out of your shoulders...
i hope you check back , and lets get smiling again
deep breathing , well .., i have to work at that myself, but you can breathe the tension out of your shoulders...
i hope you check back , and lets get smiling again
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Mysticalflame
- Posts: 19
- Joined: Sat Jan 22, 2011 9:43 pm
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Mysticalflame
- Posts: 19
- Joined: Sat Jan 22, 2011 9:43 pm
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Mysticalflame
- Posts: 19
- Joined: Sat Jan 22, 2011 9:43 pm
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TackingIntoTheWind
- Posts: 1060
- Joined: Sat Nov 21, 2009 11:35 am
- Location: South Wales
Hi (((( Mysticalflame )))), welcome to the forum! 
You said in your introduction: " I blamed myself for this outcome. If I weren't so weak, I wouldn't end up like this. If only I have the strength & courage to persevere. "
I have felt very similar emotions myself on many occasions. However, I do remind myself that that " is the depression talking. " I don't believe that people who experience depression are, intrinsically, any " weaker " or " less brave " than people who don't. So, I do very much believe that you do have the strength and ability to persevere, and take yourself in a new direction. The symptoms you mention do seem to be very frequently found among people who experience depression. And, as (((( Obayan )))) very wisely said, you may well find counselling and medication helpful.
But, at root, I do believe that you can find your way to better times. How precisely you will do that will be personal to you, just as it is to me. But you can do it!
Afterall, remember Winston Churchill! If ever there was a man of strength, confidence and perseverance it was him! ( And he experienced depression!
)
You said in your introduction: " I blamed myself for this outcome. If I weren't so weak, I wouldn't end up like this. If only I have the strength & courage to persevere. "
I have felt very similar emotions myself on many occasions. However, I do remind myself that that " is the depression talking. " I don't believe that people who experience depression are, intrinsically, any " weaker " or " less brave " than people who don't. So, I do very much believe that you do have the strength and ability to persevere, and take yourself in a new direction. The symptoms you mention do seem to be very frequently found among people who experience depression. And, as (((( Obayan )))) very wisely said, you may well find counselling and medication helpful.
But, at root, I do believe that you can find your way to better times. How precisely you will do that will be personal to you, just as it is to me. But you can do it!
Afterall, remember Winston Churchill! If ever there was a man of strength, confidence and perseverance it was him! ( And he experienced depression!
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TackingIntoTheWind
- Posts: 1060
- Joined: Sat Nov 21, 2009 11:35 am
- Location: South Wales
Thanks (((( Obayan ))))!
( Although, I'm still working on thinking of myself as wise... I'm so glad I'm here to be helped by everyone else! )
(((( Mysticalflame )))), (((( Obayan ))))) is so right when she says that you won't be alone. My own experience has often shown me that, to borrow a phrase from Robert McCall, The Equalizer, " Around every corner there is someone who cares. "
( Although, I'm still working on thinking of myself as wise...
I'm so glad I'm here to be helped by everyone else! )
(((( Mysticalflame )))), (((( Obayan ))))) is so right when she says that you won't be alone. My own experience has often shown me that, to borrow a phrase from Robert McCall, The Equalizer, " Around every corner there is someone who cares. "
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