between the letters

[OnlyAshes]

"My name is not important."

Those were the first words I said to my ex and current fiance, and how I often tend to introduce myself. Needless to say, when God handed out self esteem, He skipped me.

Granted, that could also be because he skipped me in the looks department, as well as overall ambition, charisma, sanity, and pretty much everything else required to function among other human beings.

But anyhow...my name is Ash. I'm 5'2", 20 years old, kinda alternative looking, and battling debilitating depression, as well as severe ADD and post traumatic stress disorder, among everything else on the damn planet. More or less, I'm mental alphabet soup.

What's your name?

[kellyrebecca]

ur really hard on your self, nothing i say will help i no tht. But people will always see u in a different way as u see urself. maybe ask them around them how they see u?

[crystalgaze]

Hi Ash! Welcome! One thing I will say right now is: I would encourage you not to blame God.

A lot of what you mentioned can be worked on or improved in some kind of way. The key is to select how you will tackle your issues. (e.g. Self-esteem, looks department, as well as overall ambition, charisma, sanity, and pretty much everything else required to function as you put it)

If you don't have it naturally, then it can be cultivated. Do not give up hope & do not give up on yourself or your life.

[Obayan]

Hi Ash. I have ptsd as well as a multitude of physical ailments. CBT helped me a lot. Have you tried it?

[OnlyAshes]

Hi back...I don't actually blame God btw. I am Catholic, even though most people dont guess that right off...and I did CBT for my OCD in the past. It helped, but as far as my PTSD goes it actually affects my depression more than anxiety...overall anyway, you know, aside from panic attacks and nightmares and paranoia...ok maybe there IS some anxiety? ha...

[hollyann]

Hi Ash nice too meet you. Its not uncommon for ptsd and anxiety to go hand and hand.I'm sorry that you are dealing with it. Maybe the therapy would be worth a try.

Holly

[Warmsoul/Jeanie13]

Welcome Ashes,

As you can see this is a caring site, one that people reach out and support one another. I hope you see the compassion we have for each other and will continue posting to the new family.

Warmsoul