hello; some advice please

[2ugdoll2]

Hello, I'm 16 and I've never been diagnosed with depression but I feel bad all the time. My father has a superiority complex and criticizes everything I do. I try to do better for him, but he just doesn't think I'm good enough for anything. My mother is very submissive and she always agrees with whatever my father says. My mother is away recently and my father emotionally abuses my brother and I. I've started bad habits again and its hard for me to stop. He knocked me around a bit today because I forgot to bring something he bought to his bedroom. I'm feeling a bit bad today.

[Gingerbreadman]

How are you now? I see this post was over a month ago. Just want to say my Mom and Dad were nearly exactly like you describe yours. I'm 43 now and the relationship I have with my father sadly hasn't evolved past what you're describing for yourself now at 16. And my Mom, yes, by monkey see monkey do I learned from her to be submissive. And with my primal instinct to respect my father and seek his praise and acceptance.............it has evolved to being probably by far the biggest influence on my 20 years of mental health struggles. (I Adapted my father's critical constantly negative requiring perfection or failure) attitude in my unconscious voice. From watching my|Mom and Dad's behaviors I've also developed a near inability to get angry or express anger. Therefore I suppress it (this can be deadly for your long-term mental health)

All I can say brother is if you can learn anything from me - it would be start severing yourself best you can from your father. Avoidance as much as possible and as you gain income and eventually are able to move away get out. And when your Dad tries to interfere (A common issue with alot of Fathers) politely stand up for yourself, evaluate what feels like the best decision for YOU from your guts or discussing with good friends or mentors and move on looking out for #1

Me? I'm 43 still living in a rented home from my father driving a vehicle borrowed from him and he still interferes in my life to the extent that would be normal if I was 8-12 years old.

Cheers brother