EVERYTHING AT ONCE

[vtal]

I am an Ugly fat girl who isn't perfect but want to be perfect or nothing ... at all.
I don't feel to care for vanity that girls generally put up AS one of their major prioritieS.
I think people find me eccentric and rude OR dumb may be.
I am an introvert and don't want stretch from my bubble of friends ...though I know socializing is necessity for survival.
I like to spend time with books ... who don't judge you and you don't need to be conscious about yourself with them.
I fear everything and anything ... I am highly insecure and IM quite fed up of being afraid..
I want new horizons to open for me ... I am about to complete my graduation ... still jobless .
no prospect of getting accepted by universities for masters.
I AM PATHETIC ..................

[Nebulochin]

Hello Vtal I hope your doing alright. I am sure your beautiful as is and keep this in mind. Perfection is a matter of opinion. Being an introvert myself I completely understand where your coming from. It's hard finding jobs I know but keep trying. Security is a decent field to work in with decent pay. Although with depression it would probably be best to find a job where you don't have to associate with too many people.

I'm sure a university will contact you in time. You could always try a community college before a university. That's currently the route I am taking and even if you don't get into a university the community college will give your better options for employment.

[JonsDragonEyes]

Hi there vtal. It's really nice to meet you. I can understand how you feel about feeling ugly. At times everyone in life wishes they could feel or look more " beautiful. " So often compare ourselves to others.

I know that i don't know you but I bet everything with all my entire heart that you are NOT ugly. Everyone is different life. Some people are heavy , some are thin. There are some really beautiful girls who seem to have perfect figures and looks but deep inside aren't very nice people. NOT all of course , but some are that way ...... And there are some heavy people that are the nicest person you can come across.

You say your fed up with being afraid and want to reach new horizons well that's awesome !! That proves you have fire inside you , you have strength that is bursting to get out. That very feeling you have inside you is everything that you need.

I don't think your pathetic your just human going through a very difficult time. Your special because we are each born into this world as an individual. Believe it or not there is no one else quite like you.


Think of all the amazing things you can do with your life. You can dream as big as the moon and reach so high that you could touch the stars. If you only believe in yourself.

The human heart is an amazing thing , deep down inside it lays all the strength and belief that you need for your whole lifetime. I hope that you can see that in yourself someday.

Always remember how beautiful , unique and special you are.

love and hugs always