New and confused

[SugarKiss43]

Hi, I am a mother of 3 and wife to a wonderful man but....ya I say but...I am just not happy with anything. it seems everything makes me angry, I raise my voice to my kids all the time. I hear me doing it and feel it but I cant seem to stop myself. I could careless if I interact as a family, like right now everyone is outside playing in the yard and having fun and here I sit. Couldn't careless. What is wrong with me? I go to the doctor and ask for leave from work for a break and get told no, and when I say how I feel she says go to a councillor and hands me a website to search for one in my area myself. I feel like no one is listening to me. I cringe at the though of going to work everyday, I get anxious if I have appointments or anything that needs to be done. If I get one thing done a day that's all and usually i can multitask and get a zillion things done a day. Now the smallest thing is a huge chore for me. I do not like crowds or feeling closed in. I was never like this. I have always been a people person and I was never angry, short tempered or cranky...now that's all I am. I want me back !!

[hollyann]

Hi welcome to the forum. I am sorry you are going through this. Finding a counselor, or a psychiatrist will be a good move. Do you know if any one thing has triggered all this? Or is it something that built up over time? People are listening here. You aren't alone.

hollyann

[SugarKiss43]

Thanks for your reply. This has been coming for a long time but the one event that has taken it to the edge was my mother being diagnosed with stage 4 cancer 6 months ago and then her passing about 3 weeks ago. She was the one who helped me hold everything together and now with her gone I am lost.

[Frame]

Sugarkiss;
We use brain power as well as our endocrin system to deal with a shock like your mother passing away. Right now, the part of your brain processing grief isn't available for all that mutlitasking. Be gentle on yourself. You may need to simplify. Your not abnormal.