Depression Understood Forums

Hi,
I’m 20 and still living with my parents. I’m studying college that I don’t know if I like. I have separation anxiety from my family about actually moving outside my town for school once it’s not online. I have a boyfriend that I feel like I will loose and I just don’t know what really is going on. My family is wonderful and I have friends that care about me but some nights I get really sad and just cry my eyes out and feel overwhelmed and nauseous. I wouldn’t say necessarily that I have suicide thoughts but I just don’t really know what to do. Everything is just moving so quickly and I feel like it sliding from my fingers and I can’t really stop it. I feel like I don’t really have a place in the world. I don’t really know why I waste your time reading my story when there are hundreds of people that have it way worse than me but I’ve never really said any of this to anyone and I don’t really feel like I can because it really is nothing but I just can’t really know how to get better. How to not get these sad attacks. So yeah, thanks for reading and sorry again for wasting your time on me.

It's okay, you're not alone. I know that sounds cliche but, you're not alone. What is, kind of bothering you today, could be driving you crazy tomorrow; so it's good to ask for help. Thank you, for being brave.
Okay, here is the yada yada, that has to be said.
First, you probably should seek Dr/therapist. It's someone that you can talk to, on a more in depth level. Don't feel weird about it; not only are they becoming an acceptable necessity; in this day and age; they are also becoming fashionable ( anyone whom is anyone, has a therapist). Having a therapist is trendy lol just kidding but tell yourself whatever you need to, in order to get one.
I say this because, there could be different reasons for why you feel that way.
When you imagine the future; does it feel like your seeing it in black and white, no color or emotion, to connect to? Or, there is, but somehow it seems distant? If you answered yes; something tells me; you like knowing what to expect...let me rephrase that, you kind of need to know.

Also, you might answered one of your own questions.

You said you have doubts on either; college you attend/will attend, or field, you are studying.

One of the reasons you might be leery about moving out of town is; you're moving would be for school...a school or "path", you're not sure of.

So of course, you're not sure of school/field of study; so, you're not sure of moving.
It makes sense, 1+1=2