Depression Understood Forums

Hello. This is a long road ive traveled, and hard to put my story in few words. I'm in my 50s w grown children. Several years ago the spouse became hooked on opiates bad enough to cause 100g in debt and near loss of our home. Destroyed my credit. I was unable to sell and go elsewhere. I got 2 additional jobs and just paid off the debts he caused. I was told by my family of origin they would not help me through the past several years even if i was homeless with my children. We then went several years without any communication. Due to a health crises with a parent i was contacted. I took time off work to care for them setting aside how i was treated. Ive tried to re enter the family with what i thought was sucess. I recently was told im horrible names. Im the abuser. Not allowed near my family of origin unless i apologize for the drama i caused by needing help as a spouse of a heroin addict. I was told thats drama and i owe apologies. I suffered so much abuse during this time that when my family of origin told me today i was the family abuser i broke down and have since entered into a deep sadness i cant shake. I have never been an addict and dont use drugs. I feel worthless. I have a choice. If i want to see family i have to apologize for seeking help as an addicts spouse i.e drama they call it. . Or not see them. Writing this out helps me clear my mind to decide. I feel completly un cared for.

Hi there. No, you are not worthless. Don't ever think that. When people are treating you badly, there's something wrong with them, not you. It's hard not to get hurt but you have to squeeze whatever positive there is. You are a good person, a good mother, a good partner. If people can't see that, let them be.

If you really can't get out of your situation and need their help for the sake of your children, then swallow your pride. It doesn't make you less of a person, and it doesn't mean you admit to what they think. Karma will happen eventually. Find happiness in the thought that you know the truth.