Shopping to take the pain away

Shared experiences of life, and the path that has led you to where you are.

Moderators: windsong, cj-, BlueGobi, Moderators, Arryn, Frame

shopoholic7
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Apr 29, 2019 10:09 pm

Shopping to take the pain away

Postby shopoholic7 » Mon Apr 29, 2019 10:22 pm

My story.. Well if I started from the beginning I would be here for awhile typing.
Things got really bad and I have continued to struggle since September. After I got out of the hospital, I thought that I would do everything different so that I wouldn't end up back there. I would go to the gym, read self-help books, find hobbies, go to support groups, go to counseling, take the meds and all the things they tell you to do to help. After about two months of that, I got exhausted of trying so hard. I went back to my old ways.

Fast forward to this year, I quit my job. Then ran into money issues, so I had to move back home. But even that hasn't really helped me because I have this problem of shopping. I shop to make myself feel better. It doesn't matter what it is, I just want to spend money. Even though I have like no money. My mom is getting on me about my money problems, and she is worried about me. Which I get but I just don't know how to stop.

Don't get me wrong I have a lot of things going well in my life, but I also find myself over eating, sleeping a lot, not wanting to get out of bed, crying over anything.

The ups and downs of depression is what is hard. You can be happy and laughing one minute and then as soon as my bedroom door closes I feel sad, lonely, hopeless, and broken.

derkderk
Posts: 26
Joined: Thu May 09, 2019 7:50 pm

Re: Shopping to take the pain away

Postby derkderk » Sun May 12, 2019 2:56 am

I have had a buying addiction phase. What stopped/reduced the urge was associate buying with a painful result. I felt bad about how my actions were effecting others. That got me in "remission". I also would over eat sugary foods, and have a horrible diet. More recently that one was dampened a little. I seem to have a thought process developed that works like a list of distractions during times of horrible pain. Thinking to myself, "ok, here I am again. Hmm what can I try? That TV show...no. Take a nap.....not tired enough. Chocolate milk....that sounds good."- rinse and repeat with creative but not unhealthy thinking.

I'm past the worst of times age wise with fewer hormone influences, but I think back and don't remember much due to just trying to keep going. Now I can do things I couldn't before because of experience. I can predict the depression and counter it sometimes. I also used to literally pass out when I got a shot or blood taken. Now I know it was depression that reduced my pain tolerance drastically.

For me, I have a personal relationship with my moods in a way to put it. I know its strengths and weaknesses. I had to analyze and observe what it did. It seems to be it's own personality in the sense that it doesn't change its self much. It does surprise me though when I react from an event I didn't expect to happen. I feel like a zoo keeper working with very talented escape artist like chimps. There good when being watched. But if left alone too long....things go bananas. (sorry, couldn't resist that)

Spleefy
Posts: 200
Joined: Sat Sep 09, 2017 6:54 am

Re: Shopping to take the pain away

Postby Spleefy » Thu Aug 22, 2019 9:43 am

Yes, buying things feels great! I’m am an informal carer for a family member, and so I tend to do it from time to time because it is an outlet. Spending sprees temporarily distracts me from emotional pain and my problems.

Splurging once in a while is fine. But if I get too carried away, I will find another behavior to replace it quick smart. For me, this might be gardening or exercise or study, or chores.

You will have your ups and downs, no doubt. Just stick with it. Keep doing all the things that do help. If you slip for a while, that’s okay. It is okay to fall over. It is okay to make mistakes. So long as we just get back up again and keep trying.

I found the same thing with depression. It was there 24/7; however, it was the worst when I was alone. Loneliness appears to closely be associated with depression. I experienced myself. And I have seen time and again people reporting the same feelings. Keep reaching out and talk to people.

Haha derkderk, good one about the chimps :lol: You have a great sense of humor. Something that is good for all of us.
Jehovah is close to the brokenhearted; he saves those who are crushed in spirit.—Psalm 34:18

athena.vhd
Posts: 44
Joined: Mon Mar 19, 2018 1:18 pm

Re: Shopping to take the pain away

Postby athena.vhd » Thu Sep 12, 2019 6:39 am

hello.
things u said was so comprehensible.
good news ur trying to get better so i hope u will feel happy after all attemps.
idk if it makes sense or not i have a notbook for this i remember about money pockets i used to get from dad . he used to give me some money for 1 month and it was enough for a highschool student but i would spend all of it in one week.
i use the notebook for writting incomes and what i need. it helped me .
it wouldnt be a miracle but i hope it will help :D


Return to “Your Story”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests