Depression Understood Forums

Since i was in 1st grade i had diffrent interests than most of my age...other kids didnt accept me and i havent realized that until 5th grade...
That left a big scar in my life...
And it continues to happen to me...
Now no one gets how i think cuz im too into memes and gaming...and they dont get my jokes at all
And what hurts even more is thet these drama queens and kings take all the attention and treat the people who would care about them like sh*t
People like us would kill for that much attention...
I do so many favors for people and show them my talents and all i get from them is "cool"...
All i have been doing is gaming for some time and it helped me forget about it...but now comes the other problem...
My parents saw that i like to stay on my phone and pc so much and told me to get some "friends"
Now im left with my offline mobile...and i stay with nobody and rarly get opportunities to go out with somebody...
I have delt with being alone for so many years but now i feel that the problems that i keep in my mind are getting rotten and slowly wither my mind away
Im getting crazier each day and i almost cry about it each day...
The worst thing that ever happend to me is that...
I found that...girl online from gaming... and we had pretty much diffrent problems in our childhood
And we used to date...she talked to me and understood me like no one had ever done in my life even my parents...
But after 5 days...her brother found out about me and...we broke up...slowly drifting away from me...
I didnt want to go back to my lonlyness but now its worse than ever i cried 5 times a day and...im just blank...i cant get happy anymore and i get panic attacks almost every day...
I cant get a therapist because my parents would have to know about that and they are so expensive...and if my parents found out about how im feeling they would involve themselves more than they should...

Please help me...

Sorry if i talked so much but i need to get it off my chest for now...

Id love to hear your replies even if they cant help...
But at least make me feel its ok...

My english is so bad but i am gonna try to explain something. First of all, you shouldn't be pessimistic. You can read books or make exercise. Then you should think that another chance will come soon. The reason is that while you were so depressed you met a girl you liked. It could happen again. Just live. Life shows you some miracles when you don't think about it. Happiness comes unexpected times. Just live bro!

Its not about my breakup...

Its that nobody understands me and knows how i feel..
Ive never heard the word "its okay" for...so much time
Even my parents,who are causeung me these problems,never showed me how much they love me...if they do...

Its not about the breakup i would not care if it didnt workout between us...
But she was the only one who understood me...
I know i can exercise and read book but neither books or exercise talk back to me...

I understand you. What i am explaining is that you could meet another person who understands you. You will be happy with that person even more. Although you don't have any reason to be happy, you should be happy. The reason is that you have your future. Your future will be created by you.

Gamermana wrote:Sorry if i talked so much but i need to get it off my chest for now...

Id love to hear your replies even if they cant help...
But at least make me feel its ok...

Hello i think you'r a great person i just wanted you to know that.(8

Hi, gamermana. I'm also alone for various reasons, and would like to talk with you. The thing is that I'm just learning English, and am not fluent yet - you can help me to get fluent Another thing is that my life sucks, am not a very happy person, etc. If you don't mind that, maybe we could talk together...