Depression Understood Forums

So as of lately all me and my husband do is fight he blames everything on me all the time threatens to hurt me. Breaks things now I'm not always perfect but still there is no reason to treat me like crap and make me feel worthless I love him so much but I just don't know what to do anymore I want romance and adventure and fun and happiness not tears and screaming and never doing things together.... I just... idk... I JUST WANNA SCREAM!!!!

That's sad to see you or anyone go through that. It sounds like (non-professionally speaking) that you both may need counseling. Getting a man to admit that is the toughest part.

After reading your post, my initial reaction was to find out what is troubling your husband so badly. There are certainly a lot of things going on in his own personal life that are out of balance, unresolved, unconfessed, hidden, and not being held accountable for. This in turn spills over into your life and the vicious cycle continues. What do you think will interrupt this pattern?

For him to blame you for everything is a clear indicator that he doesn't want to face himself and the sin that is causing this. Easier to blame you and walk away. He will feel more powerful and in control. For you to step in will threaten his ego and his authority, at least that's what he might perceive in his mind.

You know him the best, and if he is not willing or capable of stepping in to change your relationship, (maybe he doesn't think it can be changed, or maybe he doesn't think it needs to be changed), you may need to do that with the help of a trusted friend or pastor. He will need to re-visit his marriage vows and take an evaluation if he is obeying his own words to you and to God. If he is struggling with commitment, and feels confined, he needs a change of heart.

The first thing you can do to give yourself hope for this set of circumstances is to pray and ask God to intervene, Ask Him into your life so that he may reveal the plans He has for you both individually and as a couple. God is the author of marraige, so he will be the one to lay out the rules to keep it together.

"Sometimes we are the collateral damage in someone else's war against themselves." by Lauren Eden