Depression Understood Forums

My depression feels like it has complete control over me.. I do have a "talking doctor" but he seems disinterested in me and only my money. My family frowns apon my depression and think I'm "faking it". Here is my biggest problem, I have no one to talk about it with... No one who cares or anything. My social norms I am a freak of nature and should stay in my cage (room).
I stay away from people, at work I avoid people, in High School I was a punching bag for everyone who wanted to impress their girlfriends. I have never self harmed or drink or anything like that, but I beat myself up mentally by saying a ton of bad things which I eventually believe. I feel alone and sad all of the time. My biggest problem is that I can't find the courage to do anything. I always think I'm not "Channing Tatum" so I'm not good enough for a female partner or anything like that. I just don't want to feel alone anymore.

I know how you feel..

I’m so sorry to hear that, friend. Please know that you’re not alone and you don’t need to be hard on yourself. I so appreciate your willingness to share about your struggles. I know how difficult and frustrating it must be for you. Have you ever considered seeing another therapist? I just said a prayer for you, and I hope that God will surround you with His perfect love and provide the comfort and help you need at this time. I know it’s not easy, but I believe there’s hope for bright future. Stay strong. Sending hugs & prayers your way!

Hello friend,
when i was reading about you oppressing yourself mentally by giving in into that negative energy I was reminded about myself some years ago. I also felt like a freak and not worthy to be part of a relationship. the first step for me was realizing and accepting that this negative energy from within was part of a victim role that was subconsciously controlling me. It was hard to break through that, but slowly after I stopped personalizing the happenings of my environment I regained control and self-assurance.
concrete steps for me where: taking part in a improv theater, moving to a community, being with children (helps a lot!)
I don't know you and your history of course, so if my 3 cents don't sound right don't take them personal either
just remember: there is always an alternative, and everything has a reason.

Greetings from Germany

I understand you. I feel alone and sad everyday. It is really painful and no one deserves to feel like that. You can message me if you need someone to talk about anything.