I have no reason to be depressed
Posted: Sat Feb 11, 2017 7:54 pm
I've been depressed for 3 years now, most of that time on and off anti-depressents, but I just keep thinking that I literally have no reason to be depressed. I mean, I don't remember when it started, but, it's like I just woke up one day and was depressed. I've considered suicide, but I think I'm too afraid of death and the pain it would cause my family if I did it. And I'm so judgmental in my head, I feel bad for hating everyone, especially my nice friends who expect me to be funny and would probably try to help, and who I JUST CAN'T STAND. And then I feel bad about being such a horrible person and I stay in my room all day. The one time I talked to my friend about my depression and eating disorder, she told me that she was "worried about me, you have so much to live for" because apparently all depressed people must be considering suicide, and it made me feel like crap. I mean, my counselor knows, but she still seems to think that there must be a reason behind my depression. So yeah, it just feels nice to just get it all out.