Depression Understood Forums

Hey guys

So I dont really know what to expect as a response from the forum as I know it is a place where supportive people will try to help as much as possible.. whether or not that information will be very vague/general I dont know what will come of it.

So where will I begin.. Im currently a university student studying a bachelors degree. I had set my heart on doing a masters degree after my current degree in something which I love, but which the current degree is not related to as such. I decided to see if the masters degree program I wanted to take would allow me to enrol after my current degree. They basically said no and that I wasnt taking enough biology related course matter in my current degree.. a decision which ever since I have taken as a very hard knock against my life.

I set my sights thinking if I studied hard and got really grades I would be allowed to enter that masters. So I dont know what to do now really.. I dont particularly want to do anything related to my degree as such after I leave university.. might sound stupid but thats how I feel about things at the moment.

I have also a girlfriend who lives in Canada. We've been together for 3 years and very much in love and support one another. Im afraid to talk to her about things as she is very sensitive as we both have autism.
I wanted to settle over in Canada with my father, but as he is 52 this year we have been trying to get him there.. but its not looking possible really as far as I can read on the canada immigration website. I love Canada above my own country and want to spend my life there with my girlfriend and father. I saw a recent change which said if I wanted to sponsor a parent they were thinking of making sponsors show 160,000 dollars in order to cover "healthcare cost burden" even if their parents were in perfect health. I dont have that sort of money and by the time I do it will be that I am like in my 30's and my dad will be in his 60's for sure. I feel so lost and empty about it.. I feel cheated and I dont know what I can do. It seems as if I try toi turn in a certain way and a wall goes up in front of me that cant be climbed over or knocked down.

I wont write anymore now unless you want to hear more to help determine if you can answer/give advice.

Ive had one heck of an upbringing too.. very bad. Its remarkable almost that I am doing what I am now as it wasnt too long ago things were about to fall apart badly. Hope its not coming around again for me.. couldnt handle it.

boic

Hi boic;

How long have you had a chance to spend in Canada? There are a number of members from there. What year are you in with your degree? Too late to alter course?

Welcome to the group,
Frame

Oh, and what does your father do for a living? I wonder if he can get a semi-permenant visa and see how things go.

Hey Frame

Thanks for the reply. I have not been able to visit canada as of yet due to having anxiety problems about flying. I dont seem to be able to trust the pilot.

It would be refreshing to hear about potential advice from Canadian people on the immigration system if they had any advice to offer here. Its very difficult. I could also consider moving to the USA close to the border and becoming an american citizen, but I fear that its even harder to get into the US.

Currently doing my second year (of 3 years) and so.. sadly it is too late I think. I study a subject I have a large amount of information and knowledge within, perhaps which contributes to my good grades. I think I would fare badly doing something else.

My father had to stop working 3 years ago now having to take time out to care for me and having my diagnosis of autism. Before that he was a process operator in a factory making printer parts for Ricoh international. He's a fully qualified chemical engineer though.. something which he had to give up whilst I was young due to pressure from my mother. He wants to work in the petrochemical industry though which part of his course taught him about but which he has no experience working within.

boic

Hi there,

Since petroleum is a big industry in Canada now, would it be possible for him to get a job there? Maybe not since he has no experience in it. As far as your education goes, it does sound unfortunate, but remember that many people end up getting degrees that are not directly related to what they do. My dad got a degree in 1933 in biology, with an initial interest in medicine. He spent the next 7 years teaching school and the rest of his life working in the airline business and banking. He wassstill very glad he got the degree. My brother got his in psychology and worked as an inspector for the highway department. My sister in law in anthropology, worked in that field for a few years then spent most of the rest of her working life arranging educational tours of Alaska.

Remember the road to wear you want to be is seldom straight. Expect some wrong turns and some stops to look at the map and renavigate. If a masters in biology is what you are set on then get some good guidance counseling and figure out what you can do to get back on track. Or make do with the degree you are on track for and figure out what you might do for a career with that degree.

I'm a fine one to talk, I've spent several months now laying in bed, depressed as hell and begging my ex wife to share custody of our sons.

Thanks Alaska1958

I guess there are other ways for me to see my degree.. perhaps not as bad as I am thinking it to be for me. Its reassuring to hear others who have not gotten into the industry they once trained in but then found great careers.

As for the depression and your ex-wife and your kids.. that sucks. My dad went through the exact same thing with my mum and I ended up leaving her in the end because I finally understood she was a loser and bad mother. She used my sisters and I for years, through my court cases which she always dodged from allowing my dad access to us. My lecturer is currently going through the exact same thing.. shame the system seems to support the idea of supporting parents who do not support their children properly and use them as ammunition when a break-up/divorce happens. My dad said that it felt almost as if it was comparable to someone dying who you had loved once all of a sudden.. a sudden berevement. He eventually did get my sister and I back.. but by that time we were teens and my sister is now very dysfunctional and has already had kids.. seems to pass itself down to the next generation sadly. I dont know what to suggest to you with it.. all I can say is keep trying.. dont give the woman any ammo against you and always remind your kids you love and miss them. They will remember that and will decide for themselves at some point.. they will usually always need both parents and may walk from the parent who keeps them apart from the other one day.

boic