New Life

[BliPaLove]

I'm a 16 year old girl from Mexico and I recently moved to a new city. Is been a living hell to be out here. I had to leave my friends, and I everything I was used to have. I'm not a really talkative girl and I'm really shy, but I've had good friends, but everything I do in life, since I was born, something must go wrong. I'm always having troubles with my friends, we have fights, they stop talking to me, they don't care about me, and now that I'm away it's harder to keep in touch and it's terrible because it just makes me feel so alone.
At school, I have no one to be with, people pass me by with their friends and remind me of how terribly alone I am. I just wish to make new friends. I don't care if I'm terrible at making friends and maintaining frienships. I've always had troubles, but I was still very happy. But not anymore.
I've been having anxiety attacks, suddenly I feel sad, I start hyperventilating and crying. Sometimes during those anxiety attacks I also self harm. I'm afraid of everything and everyone around me. I'm also starting to have both anorexia and bulimia, I have suicidal thoughts, I just want it all to end.
I have no one to be with, no one to tell me that everything will be okay, no one to stay by my side. My parents don't know anything about how I feel, they know that I'm sad because of the change of cities and starting out in a new school, but they don't know how terrible I feel. And I don't want them to, because they don't care, My mom doesn't believe in things like depression, she doesn't believe that a person can feel that.
I have nowhere to search for help, I have no one to go to. That's why I'm here. I've also gone to the Chat rooms, but they haven't helped me at all.
I just don't know what to do. I'm desperate.

[fallen]

the people on here care and are good listeners.
you should have a counsellor at your school who i would recommend you go and see, as you can not talk to your mum about this.
if you trust a teacher at school you could speak to them as well. moving to a new place is hard but it does get easier over time, joining a book club, drama group, or something like that might make it easier to make some friends.
take care, stay strong.

[Assilem]

I was a very shy person at school so I went where I would find other shy people. I found friends in the school library. People like me who preferred books to people and wasn't into sports or drama.
My best friend that I met in the library is still my best friend now after 20 years because we understand each other. We have fights sometimes but that's how your relationship grows. We all fight with people we love.
It's a hard thing that people won't be open to you and I wish I could tell you that it won't always be like that, but I still get the same sort of thing at work.
Being 16 is hard enough without other teenagers making things worse.