Im new here here is my story

[bigron4570]

Hello everybody i am a 45 year old male from Wis,i have been severly depressed for over 30 years it all started on day in school i was a junior in highschool and i went home one night feeling very tired and kinda upset so i layed on the couch for a nap.When i woke up from my nap all hell broke loose i had a full blown panic attack which i never had before well anyway long story short that was the start of my tailspin which is still spinning today.See i have always been very obiese and in this culture the fat people are not accepted that is what is my main reason for my depression.I have been on ALOT of different meds as of now i am on cymbalta and busprion but i still feel very depressed most all the time i have pinched nerves so that makes getting around very hard.In 2011 i was hospitalized for a severe infection i was wieghed and i was at 604 pounds which scared the hell out of me but now i am down to 475 thanks be to God for always answering prayers i could have never lost that much wieght without the helping hand of the Lord.I very rarley leave the house or go anywere see i also have a social phobia i can not be around people it make me so nervous.Any way i have been struggling but i want to say i find all my strenghth comes from my faith in God without my faith in God i would say that i really dont think i would still be here today.But as maney others we need to look for the good in all things and dont let the nasty things of this world get ya down.And also if i may ask next time you see a fat person please dont make fun of them or laugh at them or wisper to your friends about the fat person becuase it really hurts i mean it hurts alot instead go over and talk to them we have feelings and a heart to love also.Thanks for reading my rambling life..

[Alaska1958]

Hi there, I too am male, I'm 55 and live in Alaska. I've struggled with depression for 40 years now and, when I was 42 I weighed 500 pounds. So I can definitely relate to your situation. I spent almost 20 years as a diabetic taking huge amounts of insulin to control my blood sugar, had hypertension and sleep apnea. Finally I got gastric bypass surgery and lost 300 pounds in 18 months. It's been over 10 years since then and I haven't had to take any medicine for diabetes since the day before my surgery.

I've taken quite a few different antidepressants over the years and while I believe I'm less depressed when I'm on them, I still have a lot of trouble with it.

I didn't have much trouble with anxiety or panic attacks until the last several years and it's still not a big problem for me.

Are you able to work? I was able to until the last few years, it's getting harder and harder for me to get up and take care of what needs doing these days though. How do you spend your days? And how did school go for you? I finished high school, but I was never able to stay focused long enough to make it through college.

Good luck my friend and tell us more when you can.

[bigron4570]

I have decided to try to lose the weight on my own i would have the surgery but the whole process of getting ready for the surgery the meetings and counceling and all the other red tape of it is just to overwhelming if i could go in and just have the surgery done yes i would but the hassel of going through all the pre opt stuff just is to much for me to handle.I guess that has alot to do with my mental illness as for school i did get my diploma through the state i dropped out of highschool i always got in alot of trouble trying to be the funny guy trying to fit in i guess.Of course the jocks and sportos always tried to make a joke out of me every chance they got plus every chance my pe teacher got he would make a complete fool of me in front of the whole class.Ya i dont work im on disabilty i have both my sciatic nerves are pinched and it cause severe pain to walk much i try to do all i can but it dont amount to a whole lot.But anyway i take one day at a time and i keep on my diet and i contenue to pray that i can lose enough wieght to start really getting around again and start getting this wieght offf i am very commited to that right now but i also have this darn ugly depression that is always trying to drag me down with every and any chance it gets but other then that life goes on..

[Alaska1958]

I ended up getting my high school diploma from the state too. Partly because I was working full time my senior year. But even more because I couldn't stand the prospect of taking pe for a second time. I had taken it in 9th grade, but the school I was at required two years of phys ed. The state required only one year so I went to an alternative school.