Depression Understood Forums

I found this site today after many years of being very unhappy this is the first time that I have put any of this into a public forum.

People that know me would say that I have more bounce than tiger on speed yet no one knows exactly how low I am.

my Story,

I am divorced and recently separated from my finace of 4 years.

I have read so many of the self help books to get over the ex and so on and whilst they help with things like no contact and learning that I am not quite as useless as the ex fiancé makes out it doesn't help to get past this.

Most of the advice in these books tells of leaning on friends and family during these days but what the hell do you do when you don't really have any close friends any more due to your ex driving them all away and your family live on the other side of the world?

I have a good job and I know that there are so many people worse off than me but work doesn't excite me any more and it is just another thing in life that seems dull.

My ex was a really vicious person who I know I am better off without given all the horrid things that she used to do to me yet still there is a stupid part of me that misses that relationship.

Am at a loss really to know what to do and where to turn so here I am.

Thanks for reading

Hi Willow its nice to meet you. I'm sorry you don't have anyone in your regular life to lean on, but you can lean on us here. We don't compare problems or judge here. So please don't worry about others being worse off what you are going through is important too.

Its easy to miss someone if the times weren't all bad, or just to miss being in a relationship. And sometimes it takes going from knowing your better off to the heart believing it.

hollyann

Thank you hollyann it is nice to meet you too.

I guess that a big part of it is not being able to talk to anyone about any of it the relationship was troubled from the word go and ex would often exhibit serious anger at everyone which often escalated to her being physically and physiologically abusive towards me. Hell I am way better off on my own but I suppose that it takes some time for the logic of the situation to filter down to the emotions part of a person.

Thank you again for your reply actually just to know
that there are others out there that are in a similar boat helps as odd as that sounds

Willow