Hit the wall

[Overthought]

I've hit a new low resently. After a few years of semi-stability I've finally run out of juice. I been missing a lot of school lately and despite everybody's best efforts to help me, I just can't find the energy or the reason to do anything. I don't think I've ever felt so numb and detached. Last night I cried for the first time in years. It was actually kinda refreshing, but now I'm almost surprised my body hasn't just shut down completely. No matter what I think or what someone says to me, it only makes me feel worse. When I hear about how someone else has overcome their problems, I feel weak for not being able to do the same. When I hear about all the people who care about me and want to help me, I feel bad for wasting their time.

[miracleshpn2]

I just read your message, and I understand... there are times when we find neither the energy nor the reason to do anything. It happens to a lot of people. We feel overwhelmed by the pressure society imposes on us, and it ends up wearing us down.

For my part, I admit to having gone through phases where I was sad, empty, angry... but I discovered a little light: my Dior wall collection. Each piece, each poster, each visual gives me a little joy when I hang it up and contemplate it. It's like a reminder that elegance, creativity, and beauty still exist despite everything else.

So yes, I sometimes wake up without any desire, but when I look at this wall, I think back to everything I want to experience, to what I can still create and share. We always have a choice, even in the small details of everyday life. And sometimes it's just a simple decoration that helps us love ourselves a little more and stand up.