Depression Understood Forums

okay, the reason why i'm like this is because my girlfriend broke up with me in september this year. i am 18 and she is 17. she is in high school and i am in college. my life isn't a very happy one, i don't have many friends and i don't really talk much to my family. so when i met my girlfriend for the first time, i was really really very happy because she was always there for me and she always cared about me. she will always look for me and ask me what i'm doing. i really fell in love with her and she fell in love with me too. so i asked her to be my girlfriend and she agreed. we were together from august 2011 to august 2012 and then she broke up with me. the reason why we broke up is because something happened between us and only between us. she made so many promises to me like, she will never leave me and that she will always love me. and so we broke up. after we broke up, i became like this. i cant eat properly, i cant sleep properly, i cant study properly, i cant do anything properly. everyday i look sad and feel like crying.

after we broke up, she began talking to this guy in her class. this guy likes her, he has like her ever since last time. and after some time, her friend told me that they became very close to each other, talking to each other, touching each other and always being together in class. and she even told her friend that she will forget me in one day. i was with her together for one year, we had so many good memories together. i talked to her on the phone everynight for one year. we went to so many places, we were so happy together and how can she say that she will forget me in one day? sigh. i liked her photos on instagram and she told her friends that i was 'disgusting'. how can she be so bad??? and then a few days ago, her friend told me that she bought a neck tie for the boy because tomorrow is their graduation night. sigh, it means tomorrow night i'm going to see photos of her and the boy on facebook.

i really dont know what to do anymore. i dont know why i feel so sad. i dont know why love hurts me so much. and i dont understand why she could do all those things to me and say all those bad things to me. we were both so happy when we were together and after we broke up, she forgotten about me and always say bad things about me.

i know you may think that i am a child. my friends say i should just forget her, i should just move on. they even say i am stupid because i believe her when she promise me that she will never leave me. but this is me, i am a guy that really believe in love. i trust her because in a realtionship there has to be trust. how can two people love each other if they dont trust each other. thats why, sigh. i dont know what to do anymore. everyday, i see her so happy on facebook, instagram and twitter. but because she already delete me from her friend list. she dont know how sad i feel and when her friend tell her im sad, she say she dont even care and that she forget me already. i dont know what to do anymore, i feel sad everyday. and tomorrow, i still have to see photos of her and that guy. her birthday is on tuesday and i was thinking about sending her a text and asking her if we could be friends despite knowing that she will criticise me and swear at me. what should i do?

I can really sympathize with your situation. I find myself in a very similar position. The love of my life left me in July for another man, and Ive 3 month of hell.
I really believed everything she said to me (exactly the same stuff you and your ex said to each other), and she just cast me aside.

They say time makes it easier, it doesnt, you just learn to cope with the pain.

I wish I had some great answer for you my friend. But be safe in the knowledge, you arent alone.

Im currently trying the friend thing with my ex, and let me tell you, its absolute torture. I dont think men and woman can be friends, when they've shared something so intense.
Maybe give this girl some space, and if she comes back to you, all well and good. If not, then cry your tears, talk to your friends and try to live everyday the best you can.

Take care of yourself, and keep talking to us.

I hate to say it, (you probably don't want to hear this) but if she is acting that way(swearing, criticizing you, putting you down, etc.), maybe she is not so great after all. It's just you are attached to the idea of being with her in your mind. It seems like more, but that is all. Don't worry about what is on her facebook page. In fact, I would delete her and not even pay attention anymore. Don't torture yourself. You don't deserve that. Even if you don't want to, do, because maybe she will reconsider things if you completely ignore her. Maybe she likes the attention. And if she doesn't, all the more reason to move on. You are in college and have a lot ahead of you. College can be a great time to branch out and abandon the ties you can't escape in high school. Take advantage of the opportunity. I'm sure there's lots of girls on campus you haven't met yet. Get out there and socialize; its distracting and maybe if you opened your mind to new people, you will find another girl who will turn out even better than the last one. You never know what's in someone's heart until you get to know them. You seem really nice already from what you wrote, too, so I am sure there's some girl that would think herself fortunate to be with you. Whoever it is, you should give her a chance. There are always a lot of new experiences ahead. It's hard to let go of the past, but after you take the first few steps forward and begin to gain momentum, you will be glad you did. Obviously, dwelling on the past and trying to stay attached to this girl isn't helping.

Don't give up